ABOUT THE SPEAKERS
Tiq Milan - Transgender activist
Already a tireless advocate for positive and honest portrayals of LGBTQ people in media, Tiq Milan now evangelizes for the unifying power of love.

Why you should listen

Tiq Milan speaks and writes about intersectional leadership, transgender rights and racial justice. He shares stories of his life and how his transgender experience has informed his views on masculinity, race and the gender binary. A journalist for over a decade, his work has appeared on MIC, Buzzfeed, NBC and CNN. He is also a strategic media consultant, helping organizations and companies create detailed media campaigns that engage diverse audiences in ways that are inclusive and authentic. 

Tiq has been most inspired by his years mentoring LGBT youth at the Bronx Community Pride Center and the Hetrick Martin Institute in the New York City. He was able to witness first hand the intersectional lived experiences of gay and trans youth and how it's affected by social systems put in place to help them. He most recently was the senior media strategist and national spokesperson for GLAAD, where he utlilized the media to call attention to the needs of the LGBT community, particularly transgender people of color.

Tiq is currently the co-Founder of Milan Media Arts Productions (MAPS) along with his wife, Kim Katrin Milan. MAPS is a content creation and consulting firm that is dedicated to creating narratives of queer people and their allies. View his published work, features and appearances here.

More profile about the speaker
Tiq Milan | Speaker | TED.com
Kim Katrin Milan - Writer, educator, artist
Through her art and writing, Kim Katrin Milan advocates for queer, trans and feminist issues. Now she’s using her own love story to help bridge communities.

Why you should listen

A daughter of the diaspora -- Afro-Caribbean, Venezuelan Arawak, Indian and Scottish, hailing from Trinidad and living between Toronto and New York -- Kim Katrin Milan is an acclaimed educator, writer and artist.

Kim is the co-founder and Executive Director of The People Project, an initiative to bring forth local and international community development for queer and trans folks of color and their allies through alternative education, art­-activism and collaboration. She is also one of the owners of the Glad Day Book Shop, the oldest LGBT bookstore in the world. 

As an educator, Kim travels around the world talking to people about justice, equity and human rights. She is dedicated to inclusivity and invested in arousing a sense of curiosity and empathy in her audience. She uniquely weaves together the historical context, statistical analysis, as well as current events.

A public researcher, consultant and human rights educator, Kim has shared hundreds of unique resources and presentations around intersectional issues including race, ability and gender. As a social entrepreneur, she speaks to the opportunities and challenges for women in business and leadership roles. With great openness, she welcomes difficult conversations hosting community dialogues and sharing practical strategies around sexuality and consent, queer and trans allyship. and anti-racism and equity.

Since 2012, Kim has spoken at universities including Princeton, Dartmouth, McGill and Mount Allison. She has opened for cultural scholar Cornel West at UC Davis, delivered the keynote address at HBCU's Morehouse and Spelman's first Pride, and she was a panelist at Amber Rose's first SlutWalk. She has hosted events for the United Nations, acted as the Grand Marshall for Hudson, NY Pride and hosted an session at Dreamforce 2016.

Kim has contributed to Cosmopolitan, MTV, NBC, Larry King Now, Buzzfeed and the CBC, both independently and alongside her husband Tiq Milan. She regularly contributes to TeleSUR English, the Central American news network.

More profile about the speaker
Kim Katrin Milan | Speaker | TED.com
TEDWomen 2016

Tiq Milan and Kim Katrin Milan: A queer vision of love and marriage

Tik Milan i Kim Katrin Milan (Tiq Milan and Kim Katrin Milan): Ljubav koja nam dozvoljava da budemo mi sami

Filmed:
1,566,834 views

Ljubav je oruđe revolucionarne promene i staza ka inkluzivnosti i razumevanju LGBTK+ zajednice. Aktivisti u braku, Tik i Kim Katrin Milan su osmislili svoj brak - kao transrodni muškarac i cisrodna žena - kao raznolik uzor mogućnosti. Zaraznom radošću, Tik i Kim preispituju naše zablude o tome ko bi oni mogli da budu i nude viziju inkluzivne, izazovne ljubavi koja raste iz dana u dan.
- Transgender activist
Already a tireless advocate for positive and honest portrayals of LGBTQ people in media, Tiq Milan now evangelizes for the unifying power of love. Full bio - Writer, educator, artist
Through her art and writing, Kim Katrin Milan advocates for queer, trans and feminist issues. Now she’s using her own love story to help bridge communities. Full bio

Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.

00:12
TiqTiq MilanMilan: Our first conversationразговор
was on FacebookFacebook,
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Tik Milan: Naš prvi razgovor
je bio na Fejsbuku
00:15
and it was threeтри daysдана long.
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i trajao je tri dana.
00:17
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
00:19
We sharedдељени over 3,000 messagesпоруке betweenизмеђу us,
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Razmenili smo međusobno preko 3000 poruka,
00:21
and it was duringу току those 72 hoursсати
that I knewзнала she was going to be my wifeжена.
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i tokom ta 72 sata sam shvatio
da će da mi bude supruga.
00:26
We didn't wait any prerequisitepreduslov
amountизнос of time for our courtshipудварање;
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Nismo čekali na očekivanu
količinu vremena za naše udvaranje;
00:29
we told eachсваки other
the vulnerableрањив truthsистине up frontфронт:
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unapred smo jedno drugom
rekli ranjive istine:
00:32
I am a transgendertransrodna osoba man,
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ja sam transrodni muškarac,
00:33
whichкоја meansзначи the F on my birthрођење
certificateпотврда should have stoodстајао for "FalseFALSE,"
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što će reći da bi Ž na mom izvodu
trebalo da predstavlja "živa neistina"
00:37
insteadуместо тога of "FemaleŽenka."
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umesto "ženski".
00:38
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
00:39
WalkingHodanje around as a womanжена in the worldсвет
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Dok sam hodao kroz svet kao žena
00:41
feltосетио like walkingХодање with
pebbleskamenje in my shoesципеле.
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osećao sam kao da hodam
s kamenčićima u cipelama.
00:44
It tookузела the rhythmритам out of my swaggerсваггер,
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Moje geganje je bilo bez ritma,
00:46
it threwбацила me off balanceбаланс,
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gubio sam ravnotežu,
00:47
it painedpatila me with everyсваки stepкорак
I tookузела forwardнапред.
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svaki korak napred me je boleo.
00:49
But todayданас I'm a man of my ownвластити intentionнамера;
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Ali danas sam
po sopstvenoj volji muškarac;
00:52
a man of my ownвластити designдизајн.
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muškarac po sopstvenoj kreaciji.
00:54
KimKim KatrinKatrin MilanMilan: I am
a cisgendercisgender queerkvir womanжена.
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Kim Katrin Milan: Ja sam
cisrodna kvir žena.
00:57
CisgenderCisgender meansзначи the genderпол
I was assignedдодељен at birthрођење
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Cisrodnost znači da rod
koji mi je određen po rođenju
00:59
is still and has always been femaleзенски пол.
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još uvek jeste i uvek je bio ženski.
01:02
This doesn't make me naturalприродно or normalнормално,
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Zbog toga nisam prirodna ili normalna,
01:05
this is just one way of describingописујући
the manyмноги differentразличит waysначини
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to je samo jedan od načina
da se opišu brojni različiti načini
01:08
that we existпостоје in this worldсвет.
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na koje postojimo u svetu.
01:10
And queerkvir is a culturalкултурно termтермина,
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A kvir je kulturološki termin,
01:12
but in this caseслучај,
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ali u ovom slučaju
01:13
it refersодноси се to the way that I'm not
restrictedограничен by genderпол
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se odnosi na to da nisam ograničena rodom
01:15
when it comesдолази to choosingBiranje partnersпартнери.
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kada se radi o izboru partnera.
01:17
I've identifiedидентификовани in a fewнеколико differentразличит waysначини --
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Određuju me na nekoliko
različitih načina -
01:19
as a bisexualbiseksualna, as a lesbianlezbijka --
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kao biseksualku, kao lezbejku -
01:21
but for me,
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ali što se mene tiče
01:22
queernessqueerness encompassesобухвата all of the layersслојева
of who I am and how I've lovedвољен.
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biti kvir obuhvata sve slojeve
onoga ko sam i kako volim.
01:27
I'm layersслојева, and not fractionsrazlomke.
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Ja sam od slojeva, a ne od frakcija.
01:30
And for me,
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A za mene
01:31
the factчињеница that he was queerkvir
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je činjenica da je on kvir
01:32
meantмислио that I could trustповерење his courtshipудварање
from the very beginningпочетак.
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značila da mogu da verujem
njegovom udvaranju od samog početka.
01:36
As queerkvir and transTrans people,
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Kao kvir i transrodni ljudi
01:37
we're so oftenчесто excludedisključeno
from institutionsинституције and traditionsтрадиције.
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prečesto nas isključuju
iz institucija i tradicija.
01:41
We createстворити spacesпросторе outsideспоља of conventionконвенција,
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Stvaramo prostore van konvencija,
01:44
includingукључујући the conventionskonvencije of time.
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uključujući konvencije vremena.
01:46
And in those 3,000 messagesпоруке betweenизмеђу us,
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A u tih 3000 poruka između nas,
01:49
we collapsedсрушио се time;
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zaustavili smo vreme;
01:51
we queeredqueered it;
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iskrivili smo ga;
01:52
we laidположено it all on the tableсто.
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sve smo izneli na čistac.
01:54
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
01:55
With no pretensePretvaranje at all.
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Bez ikakvog pretvaranja.
01:57
And this meantмислио that we were ableу могуцности
to commitурадити to eachсваки other
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To znači da smo bili u stanju
da se posvetimo jedno drugom
02:00
in a profoundlyдубоко differentразличит way.
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na istinski različite načine.
02:02
So oftenчесто what we're told is this ideaидеја
of the "GoldenZlatna RulePravilo,"
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Prečesto nam govore
o nekakvoj ideji "zlatnog pravila",
02:06
that we should treatлијечити other people
the way we want to be treatedтретирани.
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da bi trebalo da tretiramo druge
kako želimo da se prema nama odnose.
02:10
But the problemпроблем with that
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No problem s tim
02:11
is that it assumesпретпоставља that we are
the standardстандард for other people,
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je u pretpostavci da smo mi
standard za druge ljude,
02:14
and we're not.
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a nismo.
02:15
We need to treatлијечити other people
the way they want to be treatedтретирани,
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Moramo da tretiramo druge
kako oni žele da se odnosimo prema njima,
02:19
whichкоја meansзначи we had to askпитати.
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što znači da moramo da pitamo.
02:21
I couldn'tније могао assumeпретпоставити that the kindкинд
of love that TiqTiq neededпотребно
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Nisam pretpostavljala da je ljubav
koja je potrebna Tiku
02:23
was the sameисти kindкинд of love that I neededпотребно.
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ista ona koja je potrebna meni.
02:25
So I askedпитао him everything --
about his fearsстрахови, his insecuritiesnesigurnost --
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Pa sam ga pitala o svemu -
o njegovim strahovima, nesigurnostima -
02:30
and we startedпочела from there.
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i počeli smo odatle.
02:31
TMTM: I didn't know what
kindкинд of love I neededпотребно.
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TM: Nisam znao
kakva mi je ljubav potrebna.
02:34
I had just come out of a year-longjednogodišnjeg fogмагла
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Upravo sam bio izašao
iz jednogodišnje magle,
02:36
of beingбиће rejectedодбијен and utterlyпотпуно depletediscrpljene.
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bio sam odbačen i krajnje iscrpljen.
02:38
I had someoneнеко look me in my eyesочи
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Neko me je pogledao u oči
02:40
and tell me that I was unworthynedostojan
of theirњихова love because I was transTrans.
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i rekao mi da nisam vredan njegove ljubavi
jer sam transrodan.
02:44
And there's a cultureкултура of lovelessnesslovelessness
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I postoji kultura odsustva ljubavi
02:46
that we'veми смо createdстворено around
transgendertransrodna osoba people.
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koju smo stvorili oko transrodnih ljudi.
02:48
It's reasonedurazumiti, justifiedоправдано
and oftenчесто signedпотписан into lawзакон.
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Ona je obrazložena, opravdana
i često zakonski regulisana.
02:51
And I was a heartbeatOtkucaji srca away
from internalizinginternalizing that messageпорука,
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I bio sam za dlaku daleko
od internalizacije te poruke
02:54
that I wasn'tније worthyдостојан.
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da sam bezvredan.
02:56
But KimKim said that I was her idealидеалан --
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No Kim je rekla da sam njoj idealan -
02:58
the heartbrokenslomljeno srce messнеред that I was.
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takav nered slomljenog srca.
02:59
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
03:01
KKMKKM: He totallyтотално was my idealидеалан.
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KKM: Skroz je bio idealan.
03:03
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
03:04
In more waysначини than one.
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Na više načina.
03:05
BothOboje poetspesnici, writersписци, creativeskreativci
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I kao pesnici, pisci, kreativci
03:08
with a long historyисторија
of communityзаједница work behindиза us,
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s dugom istorijom rada u zajednici iza nas
03:10
and bigвелики, hugeогромно dreamsснове
of a familyпородица in frontфронт of us,
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i s velikim, ogromnim snovima
o porodici ispred nas,
03:13
we sharedдељени a lot of things in commonзаједнички,
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mnogo toga nam je bilo zajedničko,
03:15
but we were alsoтакође incrediblyневероватно differentразличит.
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ali smo bili i neverovatno različiti.
03:17
I've been a lifelongдоживотно travelerputnik
and a bitмало of an orphansiroče,
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Ja sam čitav život bila putnica
i na neki način siroče,
03:20
whereasдок he comesдолази from a hugeогромно familyпородица,
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dok on potiče iz ogromne porodice
03:22
and definitelyдефинитивно staysостаје groundedзаснован.
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i definitivno je usidren.
03:24
I oftenчесто kindкинд of sumсум up
the differencesРазлике in our strengthsprednosti
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Često sumiram razlike
u našim jačim stranama
03:27
by sayingговорећи, "Keep me safeсигурно,
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rečima: "Pruži mi bezbednost
03:28
and I'll keep you wildдивље."
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i ja ću ti pružiti slobodu."
03:30
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
03:34
TMTM: We have marginalizedobezvrijedili identitiesIdentiteti
but we don't liveживи marginalizedobezvrijedili livesживи.
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TM: Imamo marginalizovane identitete,
ali ne živimo marginalizovane živote.
03:39
BeingBiti queerkvir and transTrans is about creatingстварање
newново waysначини of existingпостојећи.
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Kad ste kvir i transrodni radi se
o stvaranju novih vidova postojanja.
03:42
It's about lovingљубави people as they are,
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O tome da volite ljude kakvi jesu,
03:44
not as they're supposedпретпостављено to be.
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a ne kakvi bi trebalo da budu.
03:46
KimKim is unapologeticallyizvinjenja feminineфеминине
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Kim je ženstvena bez pardona
03:48
in a worldсвет that is oftenчесто cruelокрутно and violentнасилан
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u svetu koji je često okrutan i nasilan
03:51
to womenЖене who are
too proudпоносан and too freeingoslobađanje.
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prema ženama koje su
suviše ponosne i slobodne.
03:53
And I didn't enterунесите into this unionунија
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I ja nisam ušao u ovu zajednicu
03:55
underиспод the auspicespokroviteljstvom that she
was going to be my helperPomagač or my ribrebro,
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pod pretpostavkom da će ona
da mi bude pomoćnik ili rebro,
03:58
but a fullyпотпуно complexкомплекс --
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već krajnje složeno -
04:00
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
04:01
KKMKKM: Right? That's not right.
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KKM: Zar ne? To nije ispravno.
TM: Već krajnje složeno ljudsko biće
04:04
TMTM: But a fullyпотпуно complexкомплекс humanљудско beingбиће
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04:05
whoseчије femininityћenstvenosti wasn'tније for me
to reignvladavina in, controlконтрола or critiquekritika.
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čija ženstvenost nije tu da bih njome
vladao, upravljao ili je kritikovao.
04:09
It's her brillianceбриљантност,
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To je njena briljantnost,
04:10
the way she leadsводи with compassionсаосећање,
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način na koji predvodi saosećajno
04:12
and how she never losesizgubi
sightвид of her empathyемпатија.
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i kako nikad ne gubi iz vida
svoju empatiju.
04:14
She has been my heroјунак sinceОд day one.
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Od prvog dana je bila moj heroj.
04:18
(ApplauseAplauz)
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(Aplauz)
04:21
KKMKKM: Our relationshipоднос has always been
about settingподешавање eachсваки other freeбесплатно.
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KKM: Naš odnos je oduvek bio
o oslobađanju jedno drugog.
Među prvim pitanjima koje sam ga pitala
04:25
One of the first questionsпитања I askedпитао him
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04:27
was what dreamsснове he had left to accomplishостварити,
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je bilo koje snove nije još uvek ostvario
04:29
and how would I help him get there.
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i kako da mu pomognem da u tome uspe.
04:31
His dreamsснове to liveживи as a poetpesnik,
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Njegovi snovi da živi kao pesnik,
04:33
to adoptусвојити and raiseподићи a familyпородица togetherзаједно,
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da usvoji i podigne porodicu sa mnom,
04:35
to liveживи a life that he was proudпоносан of,
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da živi život na koji je ponosan
04:37
and one that would liveживи up to
his mother'sмајка incredibleневероватан legacyнаслеђе.
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i koji će dosegnuti neverovatno
zaveštanje njegove majke.
04:41
And I really appreciatedceni that we
were ableу могуцности to startпочетак from that placeместо,
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I ja sam zaista cenila
to što smo mogli krenuti odatle,
04:44
and not from a placeместо
that was around figuringфигуринг out
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a ne s mesta na kom bismo razumevali
04:47
how to make eachсваки other work togetherзаједно.
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kako da zajedno funkcionišemo.
04:49
And I think this really allowedдозвољен us
to growрасту into the people that we were
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A smatram da nam je ovo zaista
omogućilo da odrastemo u ljude koji jesmo
04:53
in a way that was incrediblyневероватно differentразличит.
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na izuzetno drugačiji način.
04:55
I love him wholeцела;
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Volim ga u potpunosti;
04:57
pre-transitionpre tranziciji, now and in the futureбудућност.
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pre prelaza, sada i u budućnosti.
04:59
And it's this love that had us
committedпосвећен to eachсваки other
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A zbog ove ljubavi smo se posvetili
jedno drugom,
05:02
before we'dми смо even seenвиђено eachсваки other'sдруги facesлица.
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čak pre nego što smo videli
jedno drugom lice.
05:06
TMTM: My mother'sмајка biggestнајвеће
concernзабринутост when I transitionedPrelazak
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TM: Najveća briga moje majke
kad sam promenio rod
05:09
was who was going to love me as I am.
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je bila ko će da me voli ovakvog.
05:11
Had beingбиће transgendertransrodna osoba somehowнекако
precludedprecluded me from love and monogamyMonogamija
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Da li me transrodnost nekako
isključuje iz ljubavi i monogamije
05:17
because I was supposedlyнаводно
bornрођен in the wrongпогрешно bodyтело?
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jer sam navodno rođen u pogrešnom telu?
05:20
But it's this typeтип of structuringstrukturiranje
that has to be reframednovi RAM
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Ali ovakav vid uobličavanja
mora da bude preformulisan
05:23
in orderнаручи to let love in.
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kako bismo prihvatili ljubav.
05:25
My bodyтело never betrayedиздати me,
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Moje telo me nikad nije izdalo
i moje telo nikad nije bilo pogrešno,
05:27
and my bodyтело was never wrongпогрешно.
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05:29
It's this restrictiverestriktivne,
binaryбинарно thinkingразмишљање on genderпол
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već ovo ograničavajuće,
binarno razmišljanje o rodu
05:32
that said that I didn't existпостоје.
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koje tvrdi da ja ne postojim.
05:34
But when we metиспуњен,
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Ali kad smo se upoznali,
05:35
she lovedвољен me for exactlyбаш тако how I showedпоказао up.
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zavolela me je baš onakvog kakav sam bio.
05:38
She would traceтраг her fingersпрстима
alongзаједно the numbнумб keloidkeloid scarsожиљци
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Prstima bi prelazila
niz otupele keloidne ožiljke
05:41
left by my topврх surgeryоперација.
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od operacija na mom torzu.
05:42
ScarsOžiljci that runтрцати from the middleсредина of my chestгруди
all the way out to my outerспољашњи torsoTorzo.
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Ožiljke koji idu od sredine mojih grudi
skroz do spoljašnje strane mog torza.
05:46
She said that these were
remindersopomena of my strengthснага
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Rekla je da su to podsetnici moje snage
05:49
and everything that I wentотишао throughкроз
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i svega kroz šta sam prošao
05:51
and nothing for me to be ashamedсрам of.
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i da nema razloga da ih se stidim.
05:53
So sprintingpočeo je trčati towardsка her handруку in marriageбрак
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Pa je hrljenje u brak s njom
bilo nešto najčudnije
što sam mogao da uradim.
05:55
was the queerestnajpederskija thing that I could do.
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05:57
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
05:59
It flewполетела in the faceлице of more
conventionalконвенционално trajectoriesтрајекторија
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Udaralo je šamar
konvencionalnijim putanjama
06:02
of love and relationshipsвезе,
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ljubavi i veza,
jer bog nikad ne bi trebalo
da blagoslovi zajednicu ljudi poput nas,
06:04
because God was never supposedпретпостављено
to blessблагослови a unionунија for folksљуди like us,
146
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3146
06:07
and the lawзакон was never
supposedпретпостављено to recognizeпрепознати it.
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a zakon nikad ne bi trebalo
da je prepozna.
06:10
KKMKKM: So on MayMaja 5, 2014,
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KKM: Stoga, 5. maja 2014,
06:14
just about threeтри monthsмесеци
after meetingсастанак onlineонлине,
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svega oko tri meseca
nakon našeg susreta na internetu,
06:17
we were marriedожењен on the stepsкораци
of CityGrad HallDvorana in ManhattanManhattan,
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venčali smo se na stepenicama
zgrade opštine na Menhetnu
06:21
and it was beautifulЛепа
in everyсваки conceivableзамисливо way.
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i bilo je prelepo na sve zamislive načine.
06:25
It's safeсигурно to say that we
reimaginedreimagined some traditionsтрадиције,
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Možemo slobodno reći
da smo nanovo osmislili neke tradicije,
06:29
but we alsoтакође keptчува some oldстари onesоне
that we workedрадио је in,
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ali smo i zadržali neke stare
koje smo preradili
06:31
and we createdстворено something
that workedрадио је for us.
154
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i stvorili smo nešto
što je nama bilo dobro.
06:34
My bouquetbuket and corsagecvece was actuallyзаправо filledиспуњен
with wildflowersDivlji cvetovi from BrooklynBrooklyn --
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Moj buket i korsaž su zapravo
bili od poljskog cveća iz Bruklina -
06:39
alsoтакође addedдодато in a little bitмало of lavenderLavanda
and sageSage to keep us groundedзаснован
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takođe je dodato malo lavande
i žalfije da nas drži pri zemlji
06:43
because we were so nervousнервозан.
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jer smo bili veoma nervozni.
06:45
And it was put togetherзаједно by a sweetслатко
sisterсестра healeriscelitelj friendпријатељ of oursнаша.
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I to je sastavila naša draga
sestra isceliteljka.
06:48
I never wanted a diamonddijamant ringпрстен,
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Nisam želela dijamantski prsten
06:50
because conflictконфликт and conventionконвенција
are not my thing,
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jer konflikti i konvencije
nisu u mom maniru,
te je moj prsten
najtamnije ljubičaste boje,
06:52
so my ringпрстен is the deepestдубоко purpleљубичаста,
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06:54
like the colorбоја of my crownkruna chakracakre,
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poput boje moje glavne čakre
06:56
and setкомплет in placeместо with my birthstonesbirthstones.
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i uklopljen je sa mojim
astrološkim kamenjem.
06:59
The giftпоклон of queernessqueerness is optionsОпције.
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Dar kvirnoće je u opcijama.
Nisam morala da uzmem njegovo prezime,
07:01
I never had to chooseизаберите his last nameиме,
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07:03
it was never an exceptionизузетак,
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nikad nije bilo izuzetak,
07:04
but I did because I am
my father'sотац bastardкопиле childдете,
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ali jesam jer sam kopile mog oca,
07:08
someoneнеко who has always been
an apologyizvinjenje, a secretтајна, an impositionнаметање.
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neko ko je oduvek bio
izvinjenje, tajna, teret.
07:12
And it was incrediblyневероватно freeingoslobađanje
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I bilo je izuzetno oslobađajuće
07:14
to chooseизаберите the nameиме of a man
who choseизабрао me first.
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izabrati prezime čoveka
kome sam bila prvi izbor.
07:17
(ApplauseAplauz)
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(Aplauz)
07:24
TMTM: So we told some familyпородица
and some closeБлизу friendsпријатељи,
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TM: Obavestili smo neke članove porodice
i bliske prijatelje,
07:27
manyмноги of whomкога were still in disbeliefневјеровање
as we tookузела our vowsобећања.
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mnogi od njih su i dalje bili u neverici
dok smo izgovarali zavete.
07:32
FittinglyUklapajuжi, we postedобјављено all of our weddingvencanje
photosфотографије on FacebookFacebook,
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Kako je i red, postavili smo sve slike
s našeg venčanja na Fejsbuk
07:35
where we metиспуњен --
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gde smo se upoznali -
07:36
and InstagramInstagram, of courseкурс.
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i na Instagram, naravno.
07:38
And we quicklyбрзо realizedреализован
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I ubrzo smo shvatili
07:40
that our comingдолазе togetherзаједно was more
than just a unionунија of two people,
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da naša zajednica
nije samo unija dvoje ljudi,
07:43
but was a modelмодел of possibilityмогућност
for the millionsмилиони of LGBTQLGBTQ folksљуди
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već da je to primer mogućnosti
za milione LGBTK ljudi
07:47
who have been soldпродат this lieлажи
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kojima je prodana ta laž
07:48
that familyпородица and matrimonybrak
is antitheticalsuprotstavljene to who they are --
181
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da su porodica i brak
antiteza onome što su oni -
07:51
for those of us
who rarelyretko get to see ourselvesсами
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za sve nas koji retko viđamo
07:54
reflectedodraz in love and happinessсрећа.
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svoj odraz u ljubavi i sreći.
07:56
KKMKKM: And the thing is,
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KKM: A radi se o tome
07:57
absolutelyапсолутно we are marginalizedobezvrijedili
because of our identitiesIdentiteti,
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2722
da smo potpuno marginalizovani
zbog naših identiteta,
08:00
but it alsoтакође emboldensohrabruje us
to be the people that we are.
186
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3335
ali nas to i ohrabruje
da budemo ljudi koji jesmo.
08:04
QueernessQueerness is our majorглавни keyкључ;
187
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1900
Kvirnoća je naša ključna karakteristika;
08:05
blacknesscrnilo is our magicмагија.
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crna koža je naša magija.
08:07
It's because of these things
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1596
Zbog svega ovoga
08:09
that we are ableу могуцности to be hopefulнадам се, openотворен,
receptiveprihvatio and shape-shiftingoblika.
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smo sposobni da se nadamo, otvorimo,
budemo prijemčivi i preobražajni.
08:14
These are the things that give us,
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1773
Sve ovo nam pruža snagu
08:16
and are suchтаква an incredibleневероватан
sourceизвор of, our strengthснага.
192
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2612
i izuzetan je izvor naše strage.
08:19
Our queernessqueerness is a sourceизвор
of that strengthснага.
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2268
Naša kvirnoća je izvor te snage.
08:21
I think of the wordsречи of Ottawa-basedOttawa-bitne
poetpesnik BrandonBrendon WintWint:
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Sećam se reči pesnika iz Otave
Brendona Vita:
08:25
"Not queerkvir like gayгеј;
queerkvir like escapingbekstvo definitionдефиниција.
195
493054
4112
"Ne kvir kao gej;
kvir kao neko ko izmiče određenjima.
08:29
Queerkvir like some sortврста of fluidityфлуидност
and limitlessnesslimitlessness all at onceједном.
196
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4142
Kvir poput nekakve fluidnosti
i bezgraničnosti istovremeno.
08:33
Queerkvir like a freedomслобода
too strangeчудан to be conqueredосвојени.
197
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Kvir poput slobode
isuviše čudne da bi je osvojili.
08:36
Queerkvir like the fearlessnessneustrašivost
to imagineзамислити what love can look like,
198
504722
3267
Kvir poput odvažnosti
da zamislimo kako ljubav može da izgleda
08:40
and to pursueгонити it."
199
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1278
i da tragamo za njom."
08:42
TMTM: We are partдео of a communityзаједница of folksљуди --
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TM: Mi smo deo zajednice ljudi -
08:44
Yeah, that's good right?
201
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1172
Da, to je dobro, zar ne?
08:45
(LaughterSmeh)
202
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1578
(Smeh)
08:48
We are partдео of a communityзаједница of folksљуди
who are livingживи theirњихова authenticаутентичан selvessamih sebe
203
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Deo smo zajednice ljudi
koji žive na sebi svojstven način
08:52
all alongзаједно the genderпол spectrumспектар,
204
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2015
duž rodnog spektra,
08:54
despiteупркос the ubiquitousсвеприсутан threatпретња of violenceнасиље,
205
522696
2504
uprkos sveprisutnoj pretnji od nasilja,
08:57
despiteупркос the undercurrentizmedju redova of anxietyanksioznost
that always is presentпоклон
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3033
uprkos pritajenom nespokoju
koji je uvek prisutan
09:00
for people who liveживи on theirњихова ownвластити termsуслови.
207
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2268
kod ljudi koji žive po svojim pravilima.
09:02
GloballyGlobalno, a transgendertransrodna osoba personособа
is murderedубијен everyсваки 21 hoursсати.
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Globalno, transrodna osoba
je ubijena na svaki 21 sat.
09:07
And the UnitedUjedinjeni StatesDržava has had more
transTrans murdersubistva on recordзапис this yearгодине
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A SAD su imale više zabeleženih ubistava
transrodnih osoba ove godine
09:13
than any yearгодине to dateдатум.
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1417
nego bilo koje godine do sad.
09:15
HoweverMeđutim, our storiesприче are much more
than this rigidkruta dichotomypodvojenost
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Međutim, naše priče su daleko iznad
ove krute dihotomije
09:19
of strengthснага and resilienceеластичност.
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snage i otpornosti.
09:20
We are expandingширење the humanљудско
complexityсложеност on these marginsмаргине,
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Rastežemo ljudsku složenost
na ovim marginama
09:24
and we are creatingстварање freedomслобода
on these marginsмаргине.
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i stvaramo slobodu na ovim marginama.
09:28
KKMKKM: And we don't have any blueprintsnacrti.
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KKM: I nemamo bilo kakve nacrte.
09:30
We're creatingстварање a worldсвет
that we have literallyбуквално never seenвиђено before;
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3854
Stvaramo svet koji bukvalno
nikad pre nismo videli;
09:34
organizingорганизовање familiesпородице basedзаснован
on love and not by bloodкрв,
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formiramo porodice
na osnovu ljubavi, a ne krvi,
09:38
guidingвођење by a compassionсаосећање that so fewнеколико of us
have been shownпоказано ourselvesсами.
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3952
vođeni saosećanjem koje je nekolicina nas
pokazala sebi samima.
09:42
So manyмноги of us have not receivedпримљен
love from our familiesпородице --
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Toliko nas nije dobilo
ljubav iz naših porodica -
09:46
have been betrayedиздати by the people
that we trustповерење mostнајвише.
220
574531
2819
izdali su nas ljudi
kojima smo najviše verovali.
09:49
So what we do here is we createстворити
entirelyу потпуности newново languagesјезике of love.
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Stoga mi ovde stvaramo
potpuno nove jezike ljubavi,
09:54
OnesOne koje that are about creatingстварање the spaceпростор
for us to be our authenticаутентичан selvessamih sebe
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kod kojih se radi o stvaranju prostora
u kom bismo bili istinski mi,
09:58
and not imposingнаметање this standardстандард
223
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2046
a koji ne nameću standarad
10:00
of what masculinitymuškosti or femininityћenstvenosti
is supposedпретпостављено to be.
224
588968
2901
o tome šta bi muževnost
ili ženstvenost trebalo da budu.
10:04
TMTM: We are interestedзаинтересован
in love and inclusionукључивање
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2296
TM: Nas zanima ljubav i inkluzija
10:07
as a toolоруђе of revolutionaryреволуционарно changeпромена, right?
226
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2648
kao oruđa revolucionarne promene, zar ne?
10:10
And the ideaидеја is simplyједноставно,
227
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1634
A zamisao je prosta,
10:11
if we dropкап all our preconceivedsumnje i notionsпојмове
228
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2126
ako napustimo sve pretpostavke
10:13
about how somebodyнеко is supposedпретпостављено to be --
229
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o tome kakav bi neko trebalo da bude -
10:16
in theirњихова bodyтело, in theirњихова
genderпол, in theirњихова skinкожа --
230
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3175
u svom telu, u svom rodu, u svojoj koži -
10:19
if we take the intentionalнамерно stepsкораци
to unlearnZaboravi these deep-seatedduboko biasesпредрасуде
231
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ako napravimo voljne korake
da zaboravimo ove ukorenjene predrasude
10:22
and createстворити spaceпростор for people
to be self-determinedSamo-odrediti,
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i stvorimo prostor za ljude
da budu samoodlučni
10:25
and embraceзагрли who they are,
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1328
i da prigrle to ko su,
10:26
then we will definitelyдефинитивно createстворити a better
worldсвет than the one we were bornрођен into.
234
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onda ćemo definitivno stvoriti
bolji svet od onog u kom smo rođeni.
10:30
(ApplauseAplauz)
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(Aplauz)
KKM: Želimo da obeležimo
ovaj istorijski momenat
10:37
KKMKKM: We want to markмарк this time in historyисторија
236
625954
2002
10:39
by leavingодлазак evidenceдоказ of the factчињеница
that we were here.
237
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ostavljajući dokaz činjenice
da smo bili tu.
10:43
We openотворен up little windowsвиндовс
into our relationshipоднос
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Otvaramo prozorčiće u naše odnose
10:46
for our communityзаједница to bearмедвед witnessсведок,
239
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za naše zajednice da budu svedoci,
10:47
and we do this because we want
to make mapsмапе to the futureбудућност
240
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3027
a radimo to jer želimo
da napravimo mape za budućnost,
10:50
and not monumentsспоменици to ourselvesсами.
241
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1982
a ne spomenike nama samima.
10:53
Our experienceискуство does not invalidatepobijaju
other peoples'народи ' experienceискуство,
242
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3778
Naše iskustvo ne poništava
iskustva drugih ljudi,
10:57
but it should and necessarilyнужно does
complicatekomplikujem this ideaидеја
243
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ali bi trebalo, i nužno to radi,
da komplikuje samu zamisao
11:00
of what love and marriageбрак
are supposedпретпостављено to be.
244
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o tome šta bi ljubav i brak
trebalo da budu.
11:04
TMTM: OK, now for all the talkingпричају,
245
652691
1976
TM: U redu, uz svu priču,
11:06
and inspiringинспиришући,
246
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1440
i inspirativnost
11:08
and possibility-modelingmogućnost manekenstvu we'veми смо doneГотово,
247
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1732
i dostignuće oblikovanja mogućnosti,
11:09
we'veми смо been nowhereНигде nearблизу perfectсавршен.
248
657911
1725
nismo ni blizu savršeni.
11:11
And we'veми смо had to holdдржати
a mirrorогледало up to ourselvesсами.
249
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2277
I morali smo da držimo
ogledalo nama samima.
11:14
And I saw that I wasn'tније
always the bestнајбоље listenerslušalac,
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662320
2815
I ja sam uvideo da nisam uvek
najbolji slušalac,
11:17
and that my egoего got in the way
of our progressнапредак as a coupleпар.
251
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3285
i da je moj ego stao na put
našem napredovanju kao para.
11:20
And I've had to really assessПроценити
these deep-seatedduboko, sexistseksista ideasидеје
252
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3368
I morao sam zaista da se bavim
duboko ukorenjenim seksističkim idejama
11:23
that I've had about the valueвредност
of a woman'sжена experienceискуство in the worldсвет.
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koje sam imao o značaju
ženskog iskustva u svetu.
11:27
I've had to reevaluatepreispituje what it meansзначи
to be in allyshipallyship with my wifeжена.
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Morao sam iznova da vrednujem
šta znači biti u savezu s mojom suprugom.
11:31
KKMKKM: And I had to remindПодсетите myselfЈа сам
of a lot of things, too.
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KKM: I ja sam morala da podsećam
sebe na mnogo toga.
11:34
What it meansзначи to be hardтешко on the issuesпитања,
256
682819
1984
Šta znači biti stroga kod ideja,
11:36
but softмеко on the personособа.
257
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ali popustljiva prema osobama.
11:38
While we were writingписање this,
we got into a massiveмасивни fightборба.
258
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Dok smo pisali ovaj govor,
silno smo se posvađali.
11:42
(LaughterSmeh)
259
690459
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(Smeh)
11:45
For so manyмноги differentразличит reasonsразлоге,
260
693806
1918
Zbog toliko različitih razloga,
11:47
but basedзаснован on the contentсадржај about our valuesвредности
and our livedживели experiencesискуства --
261
695748
4331
a sve zbog sadržaja o našim vrednostima
i našim proživljenim iskustvima -
11:52
and we were really hurtболи, you know?
262
700103
1748
i zaista smo bili povređeni, znate?
11:53
Because what we do and how we love
putsставља ourselvesсами entirelyу потпуности on the lineлине.
263
701875
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Jer to što radimo i kako volimo
nas u potpunosti izlaže opasnosti.
11:59
But even thoughипак the fightборба lastedtrajao je
over the courseкурс of two daysдана --
264
707489
3439
No, iako je svađa trajala tokom dva dana -
12:02
(LaughterSmeh)
265
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(Smeh)
12:04
We were ableу могуцности to come back
togetherзаједно to eachсваки other,
266
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2819
Uspeli smo da se vratimo
zajedno jedno drugom,
12:07
and recommituzaludnog to ourselvesсами,
to eachсваки other and to our marriageбрак.
267
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i da se nanovo obavežemo nama,
jedno drugom i našem braku.
12:11
And that really yieldedpopustio
some of the mostнајвише passionateстраствено partsделови
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I to je zaista izrodilo
neke od najstrastvenijih delova
12:14
of what we shareОбјави with you here todayданас.
269
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1914
onoga što delimo s vama danas.
12:16
TMTM: I have had to interrogateispitati masculinitymuškosti,
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2232
TM: Morao sam da preispitam muževnost,
12:18
whichкоја I think doesn't happenдесити се enoughдовољно.
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a to se, verujem, ne dešava dovoljno.
12:20
I've had to interrogateispitati masculinitymuškosti;
272
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1789
Morao sam da preispitam muževnost;
12:23
the toxicтоксично privilegesprivilegije that come
with beingбиће a man don't defineдефинисати me,
273
731138
3492
zarazne privilegije koje dolaze
s muškim rodom me ne određuju,
već moram da budem odgovoran za njihovo
svakodnevno ispoljavanje u mom životu.
12:26
but I have to be accountableодговорни
for how it showsпоказује up in my life everyсваки day.
274
734654
3316
12:30
I have allowedдозвољен my wifeжена
to do all of the emotionalемоционално laborрад
275
738484
3367
Pustio sam da se moja supruga
bavi celokupnim emotivnim poslom
12:33
of pryingkoji zabadaju nos openотворен the linesлиније of communicationкомуникација
when I'd ratherприлично clam"Clam" up and runтрцати away.
276
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ispitivanja otvorenih granica komunikacije
kad bih se ja radije poklopio i pobegao.
12:38
(LaughterSmeh)
277
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(Smeh)
12:39
I've strippedстриппед away emotionalемоционално supportподршка
insteadуместо тога of facingокренути my ownвластити vulnerabilitiesranjivosti,
278
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4249
Uklonio sam emotivnu podršku umesto
da se suočim sa sopstvenom ranjivošću,
12:43
particularlyпосебно around the heartbreakingsrceparajuće
miscarriagespontani pobačaj we sufferedпретрпео last yearгодине,
279
751561
3415
naročito oko srceparajućeg
pobačaja koji smo imali prošle godine,
12:47
and I'm sorry for that.
280
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1363
i žao mi je zbog toga.
12:48
SometimesPonekad as menмушкарци,
we get to take the easyлако way out.
281
756888
2482
Ponekad se kao muškarci
izvučemo na lakši način.
12:51
And so my journeyпутовање as a transTrans personособа
is about reimaginingreimagining masculinitymuškosti.
282
759770
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Te je moje putovanje transrodne osobe
o novom osmišljavanju muževnosti.
12:56
About creatingстварање a manhoodmuškost
that isn't measuredизмерена
283
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O stvaranju muškosti koja se ne meri
12:59
by the powerмоћ it wieldsrukuje,
by the entitlementsprava na beneficije affordedдају to it,
284
767377
3544
moći koju poseduje,
pravima koja su joj dodeljena
ili bilo kakvim prividom kontrole
koju može da prizove,
13:02
or any simulacrumsimulacrum of controlконтрола
that it can musterzbor je,
285
770945
2505
13:05
but worksИзвођење радова in tandemTANDEM with femininityћenstvenosti,
286
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1818
već radi u tandemu sa ženstvenošću
13:07
and is guidedVođena by my spiritдух.
287
775316
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i vođena je mojim duhom.
13:10
KKMKKM: Y'allSvi vi ...
288
778924
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KKM: Ljudi...
13:12
(ApplauseAplauz)
289
780099
2185
(Aplauz)
13:16
And this has createdстворено the spaceпростор
for my femininityћenstvenosti to flourishцветају
290
784033
3878
A to je stvorilo prostor
za moju ženstvenost da procveta
13:19
in a way I had never experiencedИскусан before.
291
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na način koji nisam iskusila pre.
13:24
He never is threatenedпретио by my sexualityсексуалност,
292
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3650
Nikad nije ugrožen mojom seksualnošću,
13:27
he never policessmernice what I wearносити or how I actчинити.
293
795716
3163
nikad ne kontroliše šta oblačim
ili kako se ponašam.
13:31
I cookкувати but he does way more
of the cleaningчишћење than I do.
294
799696
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Ja kuvam, ali on daleko više
posprema od mene.
13:34
And when we're rushingрусхинг
to get out of the houseкућа
295
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2192
A kada žurimo da napustimo kuću
13:37
and we have so much to handleручку,
296
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1502
i imamo toliko toga da obavimo,
13:38
he handlesregulatore everything,
297
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on sve obavlja,
13:40
so I have time to do my hairкоса and makeupнадокнадити.
298
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2187
pa ja imam vremena za frizuru i šminku.
13:42
(LaughterSmeh)
299
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(Smeh)
13:44
He understandsразуме that this is my armorоклоп,
300
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On razume da je ovo moj oklop,
13:46
and he never treatstretira femininityћenstvenosti
as thoughипак it is frivolousneozbiljne or superficialповршни,
301
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i nikad se ne odnosi prema ženstvenosti
kao da je frivolna i površna,
13:51
and this, and him --
302
819287
1816
a to i on -
13:53
he growsрасте my experienceискуство
of genderпол everyсваки singleједно day.
303
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3320
šire moje iskustvo roda svakog dana.
13:56
TMTM: I love to watch her
get dressedобучен in the morningјутро.
304
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2513
TM: Volim da je posmatram
kako se oblači ujutru.
13:59
WatchingGledanje her in the closetormar,
305
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1342
Da je posmatram u ormaru,
14:01
looking for something comfortableудобан
and colorfulразнобојан, and tightчврсто,
306
829261
2885
kako traži nešto udobno,
šarenoliko i usko
14:04
and safeсигурно --
307
832170
1432
i bezbedno -
14:05
(LaughterSmeh)
308
833626
1150
(Smeh)
14:07
But it's challengingизазован to watch her
negotiateпреговарати her decisionsОдлуке
309
835093
2794
Ali je izazov posmatrati
je kako dolazi do odluke,
14:09
looking for something that's going
to get the leastнајмање amountизнос of attentionпажњу,
310
837911
3488
tražeći nešto što će privlačiti
najmanje pažnje,
14:13
but at the sameисти time be an expressionизраз
of the vibrantживахан and sexyсекси womanжена she is.
311
841423
3621
ali će istovremeno biti izraz
nje kao energične i izazovne žene.
14:17
And all I want to do is celebrateславити
her for her beautyлепота,
312
845068
2738
I ja samo želim da je slavim
zbog njene lepote
14:19
and the things that make her
beautifulЛепа and specialпосебан and freeбесплатно,
313
847830
2897
i zbog onoga što je čini
lepom i posebnom i slobodnom,
od njenih dugih noktiju od akrila
14:22
from her long acrylicакрил nailsnokti,
314
850751
1451
14:24
to her uncompromisingbeskompromisni blackцрн feminismfeminizam.
315
852226
2020
do njenog beskompromisnog
crnačkog feminzma.
14:26
(ApplauseAplauz)
316
854270
1666
(Aplauz)
14:31
KKMKKM: I love you. TMTM: I love you.
317
859315
1651
KKM: Volim te. TM: Volim te.
14:32
(LaughterSmeh)
318
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1150
(Smeh)
14:34
KKMKKM: There are so manyмноги queerkvir
and transTrans people
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2244
KKM: Ima toliko kvir i transrodnih ljudi
14:37
who have come before us,
320
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1393
koji su postojali pre nas,
14:38
whoseчије storiesприче we will never get to hearчујеш.
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2695
čije priče nikada nećemo čuti.
14:41
We constantlyстално experienceискуство
this retellingJesam of historyисторија
322
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3276
Stalno proživljavamo
novo pripovedanje istorije
14:44
where we are conspicuouslyvidno left out.
323
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2136
u kojoj smo upadljivo izostavljeni.
14:47
And it's really hardтешко
to not see ourselvesсами there.
324
875527
2845
A zaista je teško da se ne vidimo tu.
14:50
And so livingживи out loudгласно for us
is about that representationпредстављање.
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Stoga se kod našeg upadljivog postojanja
radi o našem predstavljanju.
14:54
It's about havingимати possibilityмогућност modelsмодели,
326
882798
2319
Radi se o postojanju uzora mogućnosti
14:57
and havingимати hopeнадати се that love is partдео
of our inheritancenasledstvo in this worldсвет, too.
327
885141
3861
i posedovanju nade da je ljubav deo
i našeg nasleđa u ovom svetu.
15:01
TMTM: The possibilityмогућност that we are practicingвежбати
328
889792
2006
TM: Mogućnost koju praktikujemo
15:03
is about reinventingреинвентинг time,
love and institutionsинституције.
329
891822
2847
je o novom osmišljavanju vremena,
ljubavi i institucija.
15:07
We are creatingстварање a futureбудућност of multiplicityмножина.
330
895093
2239
Stvaramo budućnost raznovrsnosti.
15:09
We are expandingширење the spectrumспектар
of genderпол and sexualityсексуалност,
331
897724
3075
Širimo spektar roda i seksualnosti,
15:12
imaginingumislio ourselvesсами into existenceпостојање,
332
900823
1889
osmišljavamo sopstveno postojanje,
15:15
imaginingumislio a worldсвет where genderпол
is self-determinedSamo-odrediti and not imposednametnuo,
333
903167
3604
osmišljavamo svet u kome je rod
samoodređen, a ne nametnut
15:18
and where who we are
is a kaleidoscopeкалеидоскоп of possibilityмогућност
334
906795
2917
i u kome je to ko smo
kaleidoskop mogućnosti
15:21
withoutбез the narrow-mindedzatucani limitationsограничења
masqueradingmaskirani as scienceНаука or justiceправда.
335
909736
4379
bez uskogrudih ograničenja
koja se uzimaju kao nauka ili pravda.
15:27
(ApplauseAplauz)
336
915193
1722
(Aplauz)
15:31
KKMKKM: And I can't lieлажи:
337
919840
1345
KKM: I ne mogu da lažem:
15:33
it is really, really hardтешко.
338
921209
2056
zasta, zaista je teško.
15:35
It is hardтешко to standстој in the faceлице of bigotryфанатику
339
923643
2693
Teško je stajati suočena s netrpeljivošću,
15:38
with an openотворен heartсрце and a smileосмех on my faceлице.
340
926360
2365
otovorenog srca i sa osmehom na licu.
15:40
It is really hardтешко to faceлице the injusticeнеправда
that existsпостоји in the worldсвет,
341
928749
3231
Zaista je teško suočiti se s nepravdom
koja postoji u svetu,
15:44
while still believingверујући in the abilityспособност
of people to really changeпромена.
342
932004
4030
i dalje verujući u mogućnost
istinskih promena kod ljudi.
15:48
That takes an enormousогроман amountизнос
of faithвера and dedicationпосвета.
343
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3068
To iziskuje ogromnu količinu
vere i posvećenosti.
15:52
And beyondизван that,
344
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1286
A i mimo toga,
15:53
marriageбрак is hardтешко work.
345
941368
2109
brak je težak posao.
15:55
(LaughterSmeh)
346
943501
1151
(Smeh)
15:56
PilesGomile of dirtyпрљаво socksчарапе on the floorпод,
347
944676
2568
Gomile prljavih čarapa na podu,
15:59
more boringдосадан sportsспорт showsпоказује
than I ever thought possibleмогуће --
348
947268
3761
više dosadnih sportskih emisija
nego što sam mislila da je moguće -
16:03
(LaughterSmeh)
349
951053
1255
(Smeh)
16:04
And fightsборбе that bringдовести me to tearsсузе
350
952743
1744
I svađe koje me dovode do suza,
16:06
when it feelsосећа like we're not
speakingговорећи the sameисти languageЈезик.
351
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2865
kad se čini da ne govorimo istim jezkom.
16:09
But there is not a day that goesиде by
352
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2119
Ali ne prođe ni dan
16:11
where I am not so gratefulзахвални
to be marriedожењен to this man;
353
959543
3233
da nisam zahvalna
što sam udata za ovog čoveka;
16:14
where I'm not so gratefulзахвални for
the possibilityмогућност of changingпромена mindsумови,
354
962800
3826
gde sam veoma zahvalna
zbog mogućnosti menjanja umova,
16:18
and rewardingnagrađivanju conversationsразговоре,
355
966650
1542
i plodotovornih razgovora
16:20
and creatingстварање a worldсвет
where love belongsприпада to us all.
356
968216
2980
i stvaranja sveta
u kom ljubav pripada svima nama.
16:23
I think about our acronymакроним:
357
971658
1457
Razmišljam o akronimu:
16:25
LGBTQLGBTQ2SIABIA.
358
973139
3971
LGBTK2SIA.
16:31
A seeminglyнаизглед endlessбескрајно evolutionеволуција
of selfселф and a communityзаједница,
359
979145
3653
Naoko beskrajna evolucija
sebe i zajednice,
16:34
but alsoтакође this really deepдубоко desireжеља
not to leaveодлази anyoneбило ко behindиза.
360
982822
4035
ali takođe istinski jaka želja
da niko ne bude izostavljen.
16:39
We'veMoramo learnedнаучио how to love eachсваки other,
361
987525
1862
Naučili smo kako da volimo jedni druge,
16:41
and we'veми смо committedпосвећен to lovingљубави eachсваки other
throughoutтоком changesПромене to genderпол
362
989411
3839
i obavezali smo se da volimo jedni druge
kroz izmene roda
16:45
and changesПромене in spiritдух.
363
993274
1568
i izmene duha.
16:47
And we learnedнаучио this love
in our chatЋаскање roomsСобе,
364
995319
2623
I naučili smo ovu ljubav
u našim prostorima za ćaskanje,
16:49
in our clubsклубови, in our barsбарови
and in our communityзаједница centersцентри.
365
997966
3680
u našim klubovima, u našim barovima
i u našim društvenim centrima.
16:53
We'veMoramo learnedнаучио how to love
eachсваки other for the long haulхаул.
366
1001670
2734
Naučili smo kako da volimo
jedni druge na duge staze.
16:56
TMTM & KKMKKM: Thank you.
367
1004932
1172
TM i KKM: Hvala vam.
16:58
(ApplauseAplauz)
368
1006128
3100
(Aplauz)
Translated by Milenka Okuka
Reviewed by Mile Živković

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ABOUT THE SPEAKERS
Tiq Milan - Transgender activist
Already a tireless advocate for positive and honest portrayals of LGBTQ people in media, Tiq Milan now evangelizes for the unifying power of love.

Why you should listen

Tiq Milan speaks and writes about intersectional leadership, transgender rights and racial justice. He shares stories of his life and how his transgender experience has informed his views on masculinity, race and the gender binary. A journalist for over a decade, his work has appeared on MIC, Buzzfeed, NBC and CNN. He is also a strategic media consultant, helping organizations and companies create detailed media campaigns that engage diverse audiences in ways that are inclusive and authentic. 

Tiq has been most inspired by his years mentoring LGBT youth at the Bronx Community Pride Center and the Hetrick Martin Institute in the New York City. He was able to witness first hand the intersectional lived experiences of gay and trans youth and how it's affected by social systems put in place to help them. He most recently was the senior media strategist and national spokesperson for GLAAD, where he utlilized the media to call attention to the needs of the LGBT community, particularly transgender people of color.

Tiq is currently the co-Founder of Milan Media Arts Productions (MAPS) along with his wife, Kim Katrin Milan. MAPS is a content creation and consulting firm that is dedicated to creating narratives of queer people and their allies. View his published work, features and appearances here.

More profile about the speaker
Tiq Milan | Speaker | TED.com
Kim Katrin Milan - Writer, educator, artist
Through her art and writing, Kim Katrin Milan advocates for queer, trans and feminist issues. Now she’s using her own love story to help bridge communities.

Why you should listen

A daughter of the diaspora -- Afro-Caribbean, Venezuelan Arawak, Indian and Scottish, hailing from Trinidad and living between Toronto and New York -- Kim Katrin Milan is an acclaimed educator, writer and artist.

Kim is the co-founder and Executive Director of The People Project, an initiative to bring forth local and international community development for queer and trans folks of color and their allies through alternative education, art­-activism and collaboration. She is also one of the owners of the Glad Day Book Shop, the oldest LGBT bookstore in the world. 

As an educator, Kim travels around the world talking to people about justice, equity and human rights. She is dedicated to inclusivity and invested in arousing a sense of curiosity and empathy in her audience. She uniquely weaves together the historical context, statistical analysis, as well as current events.

A public researcher, consultant and human rights educator, Kim has shared hundreds of unique resources and presentations around intersectional issues including race, ability and gender. As a social entrepreneur, she speaks to the opportunities and challenges for women in business and leadership roles. With great openness, she welcomes difficult conversations hosting community dialogues and sharing practical strategies around sexuality and consent, queer and trans allyship. and anti-racism and equity.

Since 2012, Kim has spoken at universities including Princeton, Dartmouth, McGill and Mount Allison. She has opened for cultural scholar Cornel West at UC Davis, delivered the keynote address at HBCU's Morehouse and Spelman's first Pride, and she was a panelist at Amber Rose's first SlutWalk. She has hosted events for the United Nations, acted as the Grand Marshall for Hudson, NY Pride and hosted an session at Dreamforce 2016.

Kim has contributed to Cosmopolitan, MTV, NBC, Larry King Now, Buzzfeed and the CBC, both independently and alongside her husband Tiq Milan. She regularly contributes to TeleSUR English, the Central American news network.

More profile about the speaker
Kim Katrin Milan | Speaker | TED.com