TED2005
Anna Deavere Smith: Four American characters
Anna Deavere Smith眼中的美国符号
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身为作家和演员，Anna Deavere Smith生动了演绎了作家Studs Terkel，罪犯Paulette Jenkins，韩国百货商人和一位牛仔的故事。内容摘录自她的个人作品“在路上：寻找美国符号。”
Anna Deavere Smith - Actor, playwright, social critic
Anna Deavere Smith's ground-breaking solo shows blur the lines between theater and journalism, using text from real-life encounters to create gripping portraits. Full bio
Anna Deavere Smith's ground-breaking solo shows blur the lines between theater and journalism, using text from real-life encounters to create gripping portraits. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:25
So my grandfather told me when I was a little girl,
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小时候，祖父曾经告诉我说，
00:27
"If you say a word often enough, it becomes you."
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“要是你经常说某个字，那个字就是你的写照。”
00:30
And having grown up in a segregated city, Baltimore, Maryland,
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我长在马里兰州的巴尔迪摩，一个偏僻的城市，
00:33
I sort of use that idea to go around America with a tape recorder --
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带着祖父告诉我的这个信念和一个录音机，我周游美洲
00:36
thank God for technology --
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我要感谢科技
00:38
to interview people, thinking that if I walked in their words --
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采访各式各样的人，想象如果我能走进他们的故事中--
00:41
which is also why I don't wear shoes when I perform --
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这也是我在表演的时候不穿鞋的原因--
00:43
if I walked in their words, that I could sort of absorb America.
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如果我能走进他们的故事，我多少能够领悟这个国家（美国）。
00:47
I was also inspired by Walt Whitman,
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Walt Whitman 也曾给我以启示，
00:48
who wanted to absorb America and have it absorb him.
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他也曾经想要领悟美国，并向这个国家奉献他自己的知识与智慧。
00:51
So these four characters are going to be from that work
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因此，我要表演的四个角色是来源于我的工作
00:55
that I've been doing for many years now,
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是我从事多年的工作
00:56
and well over, I don't know, a couple of thousand people
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并且在--我想，我采访过的数千人中
00:59
I've interviewed.
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最有代表意义的。
01:00
Anybody out here old enough to know Studs Terkel, that old radio man?
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现场有谁年龄稍大些，听说过那个老无线电工，Studs Terlek？
01:05
So I thought he would be the perfect person
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那好，我认为他可能是
01:07
to go to to ask about a defining moment in American history.
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能回答关于美国历史上一个决定性的时刻的最佳人选。
01:11
You know, he was "born in 1912, the year the Titanic sank,
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要知道，Stud Terkel“生于1912，泰坦尼克号沉没的那一年，
01:15
greatest ship every built. Hits the tip of an iceberg,
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史上最伟大的船。却撞上了冰川一角。
01:18
and bam, it went down. It went down and I came up. Wow, some century."
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紧接着，砰！它沉没海底，就这样沉没了，然后我出生了。瞧瞧，这个世纪多了不起。”
01:26
(Laughter)
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（笑）
01:28
So this is his answer about a defining moment in American history.
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这是Stud 对于美国历史上一个决定性时刻的回答。
01:32
"Defining moment in American history, I don't think there's one;
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美国历史上的决定性时刻，我认为没有；
01:37
you can't say Hiroshima, that's a big one --
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你不能说就是广岛，那是个大事件--
01:39
I can't think of any one moment I would say is a defining moment.
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我觉得我无法想出哪一个时刻为决定性时刻。
01:42
The gradual slippage -- 'slippage' is the word
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那种逐渐的沦丧--沦丧是人们
01:45
used by the people in Watergate, moral slippage --
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用在水门事件上的词，道德沦丧--
01:48
it's a gradual kind of thing, combination of things.
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是一种逐渐改变的东西，是多种事物结合的产物。
01:50
You see, we also have the technology.
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你看，我们还拥有科技。
01:53
I say, less and less the human touch.
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（可是）越来越少的人际交往。
01:56
"Oh, let me kind of tell you a funny little play bit.
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哦，我来说一个好玩的事。
01:59
The Atlanta airport is a modern airport,
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亚特兰大机场是个现代化机场，
02:01
and they should leave the gate there.
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他们应该把那扇门留在那。
02:02
These trains that take you out to a concourse and on to a destination.
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这些能够带你来往于各个转运站与目的地之间的火车。
02:07
And these trains are smooth,
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它们行车平稳。
02:09
and they're quiet and they're efficient.
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它们安静且高效。
02:12
And there's a voice on the train, you know the voice was a human voice.
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并且，火车上你可以听到声音，你知道那是人的声音。
02:16
You see in the old days we had robots, robots imitated humans.
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过去我们有机器人，机器人模仿人类。
02:21
Now we have humans imitating robots.
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而现在是人类模仿机器人。
02:26
So we got this voice on this train: Concourse One: Omaha, Lincoln.
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因此，在这列火车上我们听到这个声音：第一站：奥马哈，林肯。
02:32
Concourse Two: Dallas, Fort Worth. Same voice.
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第二站：达拉斯，沃斯堡市。还是同样的声音。
02:35
Just as a train is about to go, a young couple rush in
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就在火车要开的时候，一对年轻恋人冲了进来
02:40
and they're just about to close the pneumatic doors.
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这时候气动门马上就要关闭了。
02:43
And that voice, without losing a beat, says,
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这时，那个声音，节奏不改，继续说道，
02:46
'Because of late entry, we're delayed 30 seconds.'
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“由于有乘客晚上车，本列车延迟30秒。”
02:49
Just then, everybody's looking at this couple with hateful eyes
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正在那时，每人都带着不满瞪着这对年轻人
02:54
and the couple's going like this, you know, shrinking.
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这对年轻人就像这样，蜷缩在一起。
02:56
Well, I'd happened to have had a couple of drinks before boarding --
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而我呢，恰好在上车前喝了几杯--
02:59
I do that to steel my nerves -- and so
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以镇定我的神经--然后
03:02
I imitate a train call, holding my hand on my --
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我模仿火车广播，把手放在这儿--
03:05
'George Orwell, your time has come,' you see.
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Geroge Orwell，你的死期到啦，你瞧。
03:09
Well, some of you are laughing. Everybody laughs
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看，台下的有些人笑了。听到我这么说
03:11
when I say that, but not on this train. Silence.
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每个人都会笑。但是在那列火车上是一片沉默，没有人笑。
03:15
And so suddenly they're looking at me.
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突然之间，所有人看着我。
03:16
So here I am with the couple, the three of us
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于是，我和那对恋人一起，我们三个
03:19
shrinking at the foot of Calvary about to be up, you know.
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我们三个缩成一团，仿佛于骷髅地脚下，准备受罚。
03:23
"Just then I see a baby, a little baby in the lap of a mother.
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就在这个时候我看到一个婴儿，小小的婴儿，躺在妈妈腿上。
03:30
I know it's Hispanic because she's speaking Spanish to her companion.
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我知道这是一个西班牙裔的母亲，因为她跟同伴讲着西班牙语。
03:35
So I'm going to talk to the baby. So I say to the baby,
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我打算跟这个孩子说话。于是我对这个孩子说，
03:38
holding my hand over my mouth because my breath must be 100 proof,
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手盖住我的嘴，因为我的呼吸带着太强的酒味了，
03:42
I say to the baby, 'Sir or Madam,
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我说，“尊敬的先生或是女士，
03:46
what is your considered opinion of the human species?'
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您对人类的真知灼见又是什么呢？”
03:51
And the baby looks, you know, the way babies look at you clearly,
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婴儿看着我，就是那种婴儿清澈无瑕地注视的方式，
03:53
starts laughing,
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笑了起来，
03:54
starts busting out with this crazy little laugh.
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开始大声地稚嫩地笑起来。
03:57
I say, 'Thank God for a human reaction, we haven't lost yet.'
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我说，“谢天谢地，总算有人类的反应了，我们还没丢掉它。”
04:01
"But you see, the human touch, you see, it's disappearing.
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但是你看，人情味，你看，它正在消失殆尽。
04:03
You know, you see, you've got to question the official truth.
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你瞧，我们必须质疑这个真理。
04:06
You know the thing that was so great about Mark Twain --
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你知道，马克吐温的伟大之处在于--
04:09
you know we honor Mark Twain, but we don't read him.
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我们尊崇马克吐温，但我们不读他的作品。
04:13
We read 'Huck Finn,' of course, we read 'Huck Finn' of course.
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我们读《哈克·费恩历险记》，当然了，我们肯定会去读。
04:16
I mean, Huck, of course, was tremendous.
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我的意思是，哈克，他当然很了不起。
04:18
Remember that great scene on the raft, remember what Huck did?
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你还记得在筏子上见识的那美丽景色吗，还记得哈克都做了什么吗？
04:21
You see, here's Huck; he's an illiterate kid; he's had no schooling,
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你看，这就是哈克，他是个聪明的孩子，（尽管）没上过学，
04:24
but there's something in him.
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但他拥有一些特别的东西。
04:26
And the official truth, the truth was, the law was,
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而且事实的真相，真理就是，
04:29
that a black man was a property, was a thing, you see.
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一个黑人被视作财富，他被当回事，你瞧。
04:32
And Huck gets on the raft with a property named Jim, a slave, see.
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哈克上了筏子的同时也带了一样资产，这个叫Jim的奴隶。
04:36
And he hears that Jim is going to go and take his wife and kids
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他听到Jim要离开去救他的老婆和孩子
04:40
and steal them from the woman who owns them,
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要从他们原来的女主人那里他们偷回来，
04:42
and Huck says, 'Ooh, oh my God, ooh, ooh --
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然后哈克说，“哦，哦我的天哪，哦，哦--
04:46
that woman, that woman never did anybody any harm.
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那个女人，那个女人从来没伤害过任何人。
04:49
Ooh, he's going to steal; he's going to steal;
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哦，他要去偷，他要去偷啊，
04:50
he's going to do a terrible thing.'
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他要去做一件大坏事。”
04:52
Just then, two slavers caught up, guys chasing slaves, looking for Jim.
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就在那时，两个奴隶赶了上来，他们在正找人，找Jim。
04:57
'Anybody up on that raft with you?' Huck says, 'Yeah.'
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“那个筏子上还有别人吗？”哈克说，“有。”
05:06
'Is he black or white?' 'White.' And they go off.
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“黑人还是白人？”“白人。”然后他们就离开了。
05:13
And Huck said, 'Oh my God, oh my God, I lied, I lied, ooh,
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然后哈克说，“哦天哪，哦天哪，我撒谎了，我撒谎了，哦，
05:17
I did a terrible thing, did a terrible thing -- why do I feel so good?'
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我做了件大坏事，一件大坏事--但是为什么我感到很舒坦呢？”
05:22
"But it's the goodness of Huck, that stuff that Huck's been made of,
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但是这个哈克的善良，这是哈克的本质，
05:24
you see, all been buried; it's all been buried.
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你瞧，全都被淹没了，全被淹没了。
05:26
So the human touch, you see, it's disappearing.
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所以人情味，你瞧，正在消失。
05:29
So you ask about a defining moment --
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所以你要问决定性时刻。
05:31
ain't no defining moment in American history for me.
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对我来说，在美国的历史上没有决定性时刻。
05:33
It's an accretion of moments that add up to where we are now,
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是各种时刻不断累加，构成了现在我们所处的时代，
05:36
where trivia becomes news.
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琐事都变成了新闻。
05:38
And more and more, less and less awareness of the pain of the other.
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越来越多的，越来越少的痛苦，或是其他。
05:44
Huh. You know, I don't know if you could use this or not,
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哼，你知道，我不知道你会不会这样说，
05:48
but I was quoting Wright Morris, a writer from Nebraska, who says,
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但是我要引用一个内布拉斯加的作家的话，叫Wright Morris，他说，
05:52
'We're more and more into communications
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我们沟通的花样越来越多
05:55
and less and less into communication.'
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但是真正的沟通却越来越少了
06:00
Okay, kids, I got to scram, got to go see my cardiologist."
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好了，孩子们，我得走了，要去看我的心脏医师了。
06:05
And that's Studs Terkel.
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这就是Studs Terkel。
06:06
(Applause)
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（掌声）
06:12
So, talk about risk taking. I'm going to do somebody that nobody likes.
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那么，谈到勇于冒险。我要提到一个大家都不喜欢的人。
06:19
You know, most actors want to do characters that are likeable --
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大多数演员都希望扮演讨人喜欢的角色--
06:24
well, not always, but the notion, especially at a conference like this,
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也不总是，但是这种观念（是有的），尤其是像TED大会这样的场面，
06:27
I like to inspire people.
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我喜欢激励人。
06:29
But since this was called "risk taking,"
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不过既然说到勇于冒险，
06:31
I'm doing somebody who I never do, because she's so unlikeable
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我要模仿一个我从来没模仿过的人，因为她是如此讨人厌恶
06:35
that one person actually came backstage
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那个人实际上在后台
06:36
and told me to take her out of the show she was in.
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叫我把关于她的戏份去掉。
06:40
And I'm doing her because I think we think of risk,
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那么我之所以模仿她是因为我认为冒险，
06:43
at a conference like this, as a good thing.
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在这样的会议里，是一件好事。
06:45
But there are certain other connotations to the word "risk,"
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不过“冒险”这个词还蕴有其他含义，
06:48
and the same thing about the word "nature." What is nature?
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“天性”这个词也是一样。什么是“天性”？
06:51
Maxine Greene, who's a wonderful philosopher
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Maxine Greene，是一个伟大的哲学家
06:54
who's as old as Studs, and was the head of a philosophy --
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和Studs的岁数差不多，而且他是一个--
06:58
great, big philosophy kind of an organization --
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很大的哲学组织的领导，
07:02
I went to her and asked her what are the two things
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我向她问道有哪两个事情
07:04
that she doesn't know, that she still wants to know.
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是她不知道却依然想要弄清楚的。
07:07
And she said, "Well, personally, I still feel like I have to curtsey
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他说，“就我个人看来，我总是觉得在见到我的大学校长时
07:09
when I see the president of my university.
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我还要卑躬屈膝。
07:12
And I still feel as though I've got to get coffee
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而且我仍旧感觉要为男同事端咖啡
07:14
for my male colleagues, even though I've outlived most of them."
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尽管我比他们活的都长。
07:16
And she said, "And then intellectually,
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然后她说，“突然间理性告诉我，
07:19
I don't know enough about the negative imagination.
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我对于负面幻想理解的不够。
07:22
And September 11th certainly taught us
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9.11事件显然告诉我们
07:24
that that's a whole area we don't investigate."
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有一整片领域我们是没有研究的。”
07:26
So this piece is about a negative imagination.
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因此这一段是关于负面幻想的。
07:29
It raises questions about what nature is, what Mother Nature is,
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它引发了思考如什么是天性，什么是大自然，
07:33
and about what a risk can be.
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以及什么是冒险。
07:35
And I got this in the Maryland Correctional Institute for Women.
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来自于马里兰女性教养所。
07:37
Everything I do is word for word off a tape.
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我做的事情就是一字不漏的录下来。
07:40
And I title things because I think people speak in organic poems,
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我之所以加以标题是因为我认为人们以组织化的方式讲话，
07:44
and this is called "A Mirror to Her Mouth."
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它叫做“她嘴边的镜子。”
07:45
And this is an inmate named Paulette Jenkins.
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主人公是一个叫做Paulette Jenkins的囚犯。
07:56
"I began to learn how to cover it up,
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“我开始学着掩盖事实，
08:00
because I didn't want nobody to know that this was happening in my home.
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因为我不想让任何人知道这件事发生在我家里。
08:05
I want everybody to think we were a normal family.
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我想让所有人都知道我们是一个正常的家庭。
08:08
I mean we had all the materialistic things,
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我们有正常家庭所拥有的一切表象，
08:11
but that didn't make my children pain any less;
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但这并未让我的孩子们的痛楚减轻分毫；
08:14
that didn't make their fears subside.
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这并未让他们的恐惧平息。
08:17
I ran out of excuses about how we got black eyes
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关于眼睛如何被打黑
08:20
and busted lips and bruises. I didn't had no more excuses.
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破裂的嘴唇和淤青，这些我都词穷了。我已没有更多借口了。
08:24
And he beat me too. But that didn't change the fact
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而且他也打了我。但这并不改变他是
08:27
that it was a nightmare for my family; it was a nightmare.
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这个家庭的一个噩梦这个事实，一场噩梦。
08:31
And I failed them dramatically,
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我让他们大失所望，
08:33
because I allowed it to go on and on and on.
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因为我对事情的发展无动于衷。
08:37
"But the night that Myesha got killed --
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不过Myesha被杀的那晚--
08:39
and the intensity just grew and grew and grew,
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事情发展的越来越严重，
08:43
until one night we came home from getting drugs,
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直到有一天我们拿完毒品回到家中，
08:48
and he got angry with Myesha, and he started beating her,
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他对Myesha大发雷霆，开始痛打她，
08:51
and he put her in a bathtub. Oh, he would use a belt.
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他把她塞进浴缸。哦，他用皮带。
08:54
He had a belt because he had this warped perverted thing
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他用皮带这种扭曲变态的东西是因为
08:57
that Myesha was having sex with her little brother
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Myesha当时正在和她自己的弟弟做爱
08:59
and they was fondling each other -- that would be his reason.
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然后他们还互相爱抚--这就是原因。
09:01
I'm just talking about the particular night that she died.
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我现在讲的就是她死的那个晚上。
09:05
And so he put her in the bathtub,
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于是他把她放进了浴缸，
09:08
and I was in the bedroom with the baby.
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我当时和孩子在卧室里。
09:09
"And four months before this happened, four months before Myesha died,
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而且在事情发生的四个月前，Myesha死前的四个月，
09:13
I thought I could really fix this man. So I had a baby by him -- insane --
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我以为我可以治好这个男人。于是我给他生了一个孩子--太疯狂了--
09:19
thinking that if I gave him his own kid, he would leave mine alone.
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想着如果把他的亲生孩子交给他，他就会放我的孩子一马。
09:22
And it didn't work, didn't work.
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但是都是徒劳，徒劳。
09:26
And I ended up with three children, Houston, Myesha and Dominic,
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于是我和三个孩子，Houston，Myesha和Dominic，
09:30
who was four months old when I came to jail.
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我进监狱的时候他只有四岁。
09:33
"And I was in the bedroom. Like I said, he had her in the bathroom
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我在卧室里，就像刚才说的，他把她拖到浴室
09:35
and he -- he -- every time he hit her, she would fall.
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然后他--他--每次他动粗，她都会倒下。
09:40
And she would hit her head on the tub. It happened continuously, repeatedly.
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然后他把她的头砸向浴缸。不停的，一次又一次。
09:45
I could hear it, but I dared not to move. I didn't move.
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我能听见，但是我却一动都不敢动。我没有动。
09:49
I didn't even go and see what was happening.
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我甚至没有去看看到底发生了什么。
09:51
I just sat there and listened.
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我只是坐在那里，然后听着。
09:54
And then he put her in the hallway.
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然后他把她拖到了走廊。
09:59
He told her, just set there. And so she set there for about four or five hours.
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他说，坐在那。于是她就在那里坐了大概四到五个小时。
10:06
And then he told her, get up.
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然后他说，起来。
10:09
And when she got up, she says she couldn't see.
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于是她起来，然后她说，我看不见了。
10:12
Her face was bruised. She had a black eye.
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她的脸淤青。眼睛黑黑的。
10:17
All around her head was just swollen;
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头已经肿的不行；
10:19
her head was about two sizes of its own size.
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像原来的两个脑袋那么大。
10:25
I told him, 'Let her go to sleep.' He let her go to sleep.
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我跟他说，让她去睡吧。他放她去睡了。
10:32
"The next morning she was dead.
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第二天早上她死了。
10:37
He went in to check on her for school, and he got very excited.
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他去叫她起床上学，然后他惊慌万分。
10:40
He says, 'She won't breathe.'
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他说，她没有呼吸了。
10:42
I knew immediately that she was dead.
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我马上就意识到她已经死了。
10:46
I didn't even want to accept the fact that she was dead, so I went in
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我甚至不愿去接受她已经死了的事实，于是我进去
10:49
and I put a mirror to her mouth --
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我拿着镜子放在她觜前--
10:51
there was no thing, nothing, coming out of her mouth.
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什么现象都没有，她嘴里没有呼出任何东西。
10:55
He said, he said, he said,
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他说道，他说，说，
10:56
'We can't, we can't let nobody find out about this.'
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我们不能让任何人发现这个事情。
10:58
He say, 'You've got to help me.' I agree. I agree.
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他说，你得帮帮我。我同意，同意。
11:02
"I mean, I've been keeping a secret for years and years and years,
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我的意思是，我这么多年来不停的保守秘密，
11:05
so it just seemed like second hand to me, just to keep on keeping it a secret.
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这对我来说已经不是什么新鲜的要求了，只要继续保密就行。
11:09
So we went to the mall and we told a police that we had, like, lost her,
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于是我们走到大道告诉警察，她失踪了，
11:15
that she was missing.
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她失踪了。
11:18
We told a security guard that she was missing,
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我们告诉警卫说，她失踪了；
11:24
though she wasn't missing.
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尽管她根本没有失踪。
11:26
And we told the security guard what we had put on her
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我们告诉了警卫她的衣着样式
11:28
and we went home and we dressed her in exactly the same thing
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我们回家以后就把她打扮的
11:31
that we had told the security guard that we had put on her.
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和对警卫描述中的样子一模一样。
11:35
"And then we got the baby and my other child,
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然后我们接走了婴儿和我的另一个孩子
11:40
and we drove out to, like, I-95.
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然后我们就开车，大概去 I-95 (纽泽西州)
11:47
I was so petrified and so numb,
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我是如此的僵硬和麻木了，
11:50
all I could look was in the rear-view mirror.
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然后我再后视镜中看。
11:55
And he just laid her right on the shoulder of the highway.
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发现他把她正好摆在路肩（紧急停车道）那里。
12:05
My own child, I let that happen to."
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我的孩子啊，我竟然让这种事情发生在她身上。
12:15
So that's an investigation of the negative imagination.
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那么这就是关于负面幻想的一个调查。
12:20
(Applause)
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（掌声）
12:25
When I started this project
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当我开始这项计划时
12:27
called "On the Road: A Search For an American Character"
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叫做“在路上：寻找美国符号”
12:29
with my tape recorder, I thought that I was going to go around America
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以我的录音机为工具，我以为我要走遍整个美国
12:31
and find it in all its aspects -- bull riders, cowboys, pig farmers,
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探索形形色色的人物--骑牛者、牛仔、养猪农，
12:36
drum majorettes -- but I sort of got tripped on race relations,
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乐队领队--不过在种族关系上我遇到了点麻烦，
12:40
because my first big show was a show about a race riot.
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因为我的首次演出是关于种族暴乱的。
12:43
And so I went to both -- two race riots,
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因此两次种族暴动我都亲历，
12:46
one of which was the Los Angeles riot. And this next piece is from that.
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其中一次是在洛杉矶。那么下一个片段就来源于此。
12:49
Because this is what I would say
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因为这个我想
12:51
I've learned the most about race relations, from this piece.
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使我有对种族关系有了最透彻的了解，在这个片段。
12:55
It's a kind of an aria, I would say, and in many tapes that I have.
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就仿佛是咏叹调，我认为，在我有过的许多录影中。
12:59
Everybody knows that the Los Angeles riots happened
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大家都知道洛杉矶暴动的情况
13:02
because four cops beat up a black man named Rodney King.
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因为4个警察暴打了一个叫Rodney King的黑人。
13:05
It was captured on videotape -- technology --
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录像机拍摄下了这个画面--（这就是）科技--
13:07
and it was played all over the world.
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然后在全世界广为传播。
13:09
Everybody thought the four cops would go to jail.
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所有人都认为4个警察肯定会进监狱。
13:10
They did not, so there were riots.
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但是他们没有，于是就引发了暴乱。
13:13
And what a lot of people forget, is there was a second trial,
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而且许多人忽略的是，那时候还有1个二审，
13:15
ordered by George Bush, Sr.
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被George Bush, Sr授权。
13:17
And that trial came back with two cops going to jail
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然后审判的结果是两个警察进了监狱
13:22
and two cops declared innocent. I was at that trial.
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另两个警察被宣无罪。我当时在场。
13:25
And I mean, the people just danced in the streets
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我的意思是，人们在街上欢呼雀跃
13:27
because they were afraid there was going to be another riot.
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因为他们担心会有另一场暴乱。
13:29
Explosion of joy that this verdict had come back this way.
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而结果的改判使积压的喜悦爆发出来。
13:32
So there was a community that didn't -- the Korean-Americans,
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（但是）有一个群体却不这样认为--韩裔美国人，
13:36
whose stores had been burned to the ground.
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他们的商店在暴乱中被夷为平地。
13:38
And so this woman, Mrs. Young-Soon Han,
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因此这个女性，Young-Soon Han女士，
13:40
I suppose will have taught me the most that I have learned about race.
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我认为她极大的加深了我对种族的认识。
13:44
And she asks also a question that Studs talks about:
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她也问到了Studs曾经谈到的问题：
13:47
this notion of the "official truth," to question the "official truth."
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官方真相的概念，质疑什么是官方真相。
13:50
So what she's questioning here, she's taking a chance
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因此她正在质疑，她尝试着冒险
13:52
and questioning what justice is in society.
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质疑在这个社会中什么是正义。
13:55
And this is called, "Swallowing the Bitterness."
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这个（片段）叫做，“吞食苦果。”
13:59
"I used to believe America was the best.
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我曾经相信美国是最好的。
14:04
I watched in Korea many luxurious Hollywood lifestyle movie.
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我在韩国看过许多描述好莱坞奢华生活方式的电影。
14:12
I never saw any poor man, any black.
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我从没看到过穷人，黑人。
14:17
Until 1992, I used to believe America was the best -- I still do;
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直到1992年，我还相信美国是最好的--我始终相信，
14:21
I don't deny that because I am a victim.
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我并不否认这点因为我是一个受害者。
14:25
But at the end of '92, when we were in such turmoil,
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不过在92年末，如此的暴乱时期，
14:30
and having all the financial problems, and all the mental problems,
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所有的财政问题接踵而至，以及精神层面的问题，
14:34
I began to really realize that Koreans
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我开始意识到韩国人
14:38
are completely left out of this society and we are nothing.
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完完全全的被这个社会抛弃，我们什么都不是。
14:45
Why? Why do we have to be left out?
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为什么？为什么我们被抛弃？
14:48
We didn't qualify for medical treatment, no food stamp, no GR,
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我们没有接受医疗的资格，没有救济粮票，没有GR，
14:54
no welfare, anything. Many African-Americans who never work
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没有福利，什么都没有，许多从不工作的非裔美国人
15:01
got minimum amount of money to survive.
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可以得到维系生存的那一丁点补贴。
15:05
We didn't get any because we have a car and a house.
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我们什么都没有因为我们有车，有房。
15:13
And we are high taxpayer. Where do I find justice?
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我们要支付高额的税金。我去哪找公平呢？
15:24
"OK. OK? OK. OK.
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好。好。好。好。
15:31
Many African-Americans probably think that they won by the trial.
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也许很多非裔美国人会认为他们在这场审判中胜利了。
15:35
I was sitting here watching them the morning after the verdict,
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在审判结束的那个早上，我坐在这里看着他们，
15:38
and all the day they were having a party, they celebrated,
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一整天他们都在狂欢，庆祝，
15:42
all of South Central, all the churches. And they say,
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整个南部中心区，所有的教堂。他们说，
15:45
'Well, finally justice has been done in this society.'
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哦，终于这个社会实现了正义。
15:51
Well, what about victims' rights?
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那么，受害人的权利呢？
15:54
They got their rights by destroying innocent Korean merchants.
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他们通过糟蹋无辜的韩国商人而获取自身的权利。
16:07
They have a lot of respect, as I do, for Dr. Martin King.
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他们对于Martin King博士，非常尊敬，就像我一样。
16:14
He is the only model for black community; I don't care Jesse Jackson.
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他是黑人社会的唯一楷模；我才不管什么Jesse Jackson呢。
16:21
He is the model of non-violence, non-violence --
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他倡导的是非暴力，非暴力--
16:25
and they would all like to be in his spirit.
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而且他们似乎都同意这种精神。
16:30
"But what about 1992? They destroyed innocent people.
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那么1992年呢？他们迫害无辜的人。
16:37
And I wonder if that is really justice
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我怀疑这是否是真正的正义
16:41
for them, to get their rights in that way.
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对他们而言，用这样的方式争取权利。
16:48
I was swallowing the bitterness, sitting here alone and watching them.
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我吞食着苦果，孤独一人坐在那里看着他们。
16:57
They became so hilarious, but I was happy for them.
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他们喜洋洋的，不过我为他们高兴。
17:04
I was glad for them. At least they got something back, OK.
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我为他们欣喜。至少他们赢得了一些东西。
17:09
Let's just forget about Korean victims and other victims
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就让我们先忘掉受害的韩国人和其他受害人吧
17:16
who were destroyed by them.
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被他们迫害的这些人。
17:21
They fought for their rights for over two centuries,
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他们为了自己的权利奋斗了两个多世纪，
17:30
and maybe because they sacrifice other minorities,
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而且也许是因为牺牲了少数，
17:33
Hispanic, Asian, we would suffer more in the mainstream.
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西班牙人，亚洲人，在主流社会中我们承受了更多痛苦。
17:38
That's why I understand;
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因此我明白了，
17:39
that's why I have a mixed feeling about the verdict.
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因此我对于判决的结果如此百感交集。
17:42
"But I wish that, I wish that, I wish that
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但是我希望，我希望，我希望
17:47
I could be part of the enjoyment.
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我可以成为欢乐人群中的一份子。
17:50
I wish that I could live together with black people.
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我希望我可以和黑人们生活在一起。
17:57
But after the riot, it's too much difference.
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但是暴乱之后，一切都大不一样了。
18:07
The fire is still there. How do you say it? [Unclear].
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大火还在那里。你怎么看？
18:14
Igniting, igniting, igniting fire. Igniting fire.
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点燃，点燃，点起火，点起火来。
18:22
It's still there; it can burst out anytime."
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它还未熄灭；它任何时候都可能燃起。
18:34
Mrs. Young-Soon Han.
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（这就是）Young-Soon Han女士。
18:36
(Applause)
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（掌声）
18:44
The other reason that I don't wear shoes
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我之所以不穿鞋的另一个原因
18:48
is just in case I really feel like I have to cuddle up
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就是万一我感到蜷缩成一团睡
18:51
and get into the feet of somebody,
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把脚深入其他人的鞋中，
18:53
walking really in somebody else's shoes.
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实实在在的穿着别人的鞋行走。
18:55
And I told you that in -- you know, I didn't give you the year,
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我告诉过大家在--你知道，我并没有给出年份，
18:58
but in '79 I thought that I was going to go around
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不过在79年，我想我应该去四处探访
19:01
and find bull riders and pig farmers and people like that,
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寻找骑牛人和猪农民，或者这种类型的人，
19:03
and I got sidetracked on race relations.
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我在种族关系这个话题上花费了很多心思。
19:06
Finally, I did find a bull rider, two years ago.
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最终，我找到了一个骑牛人，两年前。
19:09
And I've been going to the rodeos with him, and we've bonded.
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我一直去看他的竞技表演，于是我们亲密起来。
19:12
And he's the lead in an op-ed I did about the Republican Convention.
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而且他是我的一个关于共和党大会的专栏的主角。
19:17
He's a Republican -- I won't say anything about my party affiliation, but anyway --
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他是共和党人--我不会讲出我的政治倾向的，不过无论如何--
19:22
so this is my dear, dear Brent Williams,
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所以这就是我亲爱的，亲爱的Brent Williams，
19:26
and this is on toughness,
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这是关于强悍，
19:27
in case anybody needs to know about being tough
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以防有人需要知道关于强悍的东西
19:30
for the work that you do. I think there's a real lesson in this.
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（因为）你做的工作。我认为这其中确实有值得学习的地方，
19:33
And this is called "Toughness."
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这叫做“强悍。”
19:36
"Well, I'm an optimist. I mean basically I'm an optimist.
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噢，我是个乐天派。我的意思是我基本上是一个乐天派。
19:41
I mean, you know, I mean, it's like my wife, Jolene,
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我是说，你知道，我的意思是，我的妻子，Jolene，
19:43
her family's always saying,
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她的家人总是说，
19:45
you know, you ever think he's just a born loser?
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你总会认为他是一个天生的输家，
19:47
It seems like he has so much bad luck, you know.
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似乎他遭遇了如此多的不幸，你知道。
19:49
But then when that bull stepped on my kidney, you know,
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但是那头牛踩在了我的肾脏上面，你知道，
19:51
I didn't lose my kidney -- I could have lost my kidney,
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我的肾脏还在--我本有可能失掉它，
19:53
I kept my kidney, so I don't think I'm a born loser.
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（不过）我逃过一劫，所以我不认为自己是个天生的输家。
19:55
I think that's good luck.
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我认为这是好运气。
19:56
(Laughter)
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（笑声）
19:58
"And, I mean, funny things like this happen.
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而且，我是说，这种有趣的事情时常发生。
20:00
I was in a doctor's office last CAT scan,
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我在医生的办公室进行CAT扫描，
20:04
and there was a Reader's Digest, October 2002.
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看到一本读者文摘，2002年10月刊。
20:07
It was like, 'seven ways to get lucky.' And it says
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好像讲到，其中赢得运气的方法。上面说到
20:10
if you want to get lucky,
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如果你想要走运，
20:11
you know, you've got to be around positive people.
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那么你必须要生活在积极的人中间。
20:13
I mean, like even when I told my wife that you want to come out here
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我的意思是，即使当我老婆告诉我你想要来这里
20:17
and talk to me, she's like, 'She's just talking;
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和我谈话，她的样子是，一直说个不停，
20:19
she's just being nice to you. She's not going to do that.'
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她只是在你面前装好人。她不是这样的人。
20:21
"And then you called me up and you said you wanted to come out here
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然后你叫我来然后说你想要来这里
20:23
and interview me and she went and looked you up on the Internet.
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采访我，然后她去网上搜索了你的信息。
20:25
She said, 'Look who she is.
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她说，瞧瞧她的来头。
20:27
You're not even going to be able to answer her questions.'
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你甚至都回答不了她的问题。
20:29
(Laughter)
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（笑）
20:33
And she was saying you're going to make me look like an idiot
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于是她说到你会使我看起来像白痴一样
20:35
because I've never been to college,
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因为我从没上过大学，
20:36
and I wouldn't be talking professional or anything.
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我也不会讲太专业的什么东西。
20:38
I said, 'Well look, the woman talked to me for four hours.
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我说，你看，这个女人和我谈了4个小时。
20:40
You know, if I wasn't talking -- you know,
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你知道，如果我没有一直在说--你知道，
20:42
like, you know, she wanted me to talk,
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好像，恩，她想要我张口，
20:43
I don't think she would even come out here.'
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那么我不认为她会费劲跑来这里。
20:48
"Confidence? Well, I think I ride
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自信？噢，我认为骑牛
20:51
more out of determination than confidence.
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需要更多的决心而不是自信。
20:54
I mean, confidence is like, you know,
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我是说，自信就好比，你知道，
20:55
you've been on that bull before; you know you can ride him.
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在你知道你能骑那头牛之前你就已经骑过它了。
20:57
I mean, confidence is kind of like being cocky, but in a good way.
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我是说，自信就好比变的骄傲自大，不过是好的方面。
21:01
But determination, you know, it's like just, you know, 'Fuck the form,
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但是决心，你知道，就好比，你知道，“忘掉该死的规矩，
21:04
get the horn.'
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制服那头牛就行了。”
21:06
(Laughter)
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（笑声）
21:10
That's Tuff Hedeman, in the movie '8 Seconds.'
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这是Tuff Hedeman，在电影“8秒钟”的话。
21:12
I mean, like, Pat O'Mealey always said when I was a boy,
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我的意思你，就像Pat O‘Mealey在我小的时候经常说，
21:14
he say, 'You know, you got more try than any kid I ever seen.'
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他说，你知道，你比其他孩子更有天赋。
21:17
And try and determination is the same thing.
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尝试和决心是一回事。
21:19
Determination is, like, you're going to hang on that bull,
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决心就好像，你要一直坚持骑在牛上面，
21:21
even if you're riding upside down.
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即使你颠簸摇晃。
21:23
Determination's like, you're going to ride
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决心就好像，你一直骑下去
21:25
till your head hits the back of the dirt.
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直到你头发沾上了脏泥。
21:28
"Freedom? It would have to be the rodeo.
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自由？那肯定是竞技了。
21:32
"Beauty? I don't think I know what beauty is.
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美丽？我想我还不知道那是什么东西。
21:37
Well, you know, I guess that'd have to be the rodeo too.
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噢，你知道，我想应该还是竞技吧。
21:39
I mean, look how we are, the roughy family,
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我是说，你看我们，强悍的一家人，
21:40
palling around and shaking hands and wrestling around me.
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互相结交朋友，互相握手，围着我格斗。
21:43
It's like, you know, racking up our credit cards on entry fees and gas.
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就好像，你知道，把钱花在入场费和加油钱上面。
21:46
We ride together, we, you know, we, we eat together
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我们一起骑，我们，你知道，我们，我们一起吃
21:49
and we sleep together.
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一起睡。
21:50
I mean, I can't even imagine what it's going to be like
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我的意思是，我甚至都不能想象那会是什么样
21:53
the last day I rodeo. I mean, I'll be alright.
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在我竞技的最后那天。我是说，我会没事的。
21:55
I mean, I have my ranch and everything,
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我是说，我有自己的农场和一切，
21:56
but I actually don't even want to think the day that comes.
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但是实际上我甚至不愿去设想那天会到来。
21:59
I mean, I guess it just be like --
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我的意思是，我想就应该会是--
22:01
I guess it be like the day my brother died.
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就好像我哥哥死的那天的样子吧。
22:05
"Toughness? Well, we was in West Jordan, Utah, and this bull
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强悍？噢，我们在犹他州的西约旦，这头公牛
22:10
shoved my face right through the metal shoots in a --
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直接用金属一下子给我的脸重重一击--
22:13
you know, busted my face all up and had to go to the hospital.
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你知道，把我的脸打的乱七八糟于是我不得不去医院。
22:16
And they had to sew me up and straighten my nose out.
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而且他们不能不把我缝起来，弄直我的鼻子。
22:18
And I had to go and ride in the rodeo that night,
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而且我那晚上还要去竞技场再去骑牛，
22:20
so I didn't want them to put me under anesthesia,
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所以我不想让他们给我用麻醉药，
22:23
or whatever you call it. And so they sewed my face up.
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或者其他的这种东西。于是他们把我的脸缝好。
22:26
And then they had to straighten out my nose,
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然后把鼻子拉出来弄直，
22:28
and they took these rods and shoved them up my nose
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他们取出里面的小东西然后推平我的鼻子
22:31
and went up through my brains
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向上穿过我的脑袋
22:33
and felt like it was coming out the top of my head,
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就好像从我的脑袋尖上冒出来一样，
22:35
and everybody said that it should have killed me,
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所有人都说这能让我完蛋的，
22:37
but it didn't, because I guess I have a high tolerance for pain.
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但我没有，我想可能是我对痛苦有比较好的承受力吧。
22:41
(Laughter)
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（笑声）
22:44
But the good thing was, once they shoved those rods up there
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不过好的消息是，一旦他们把我的鼻骨扶直
22:47
and straightened my nose out, I could breathe,
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弄平我的鼻子，我可以呼吸了，
22:49
and I hadn't been able to breathe
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我自从高中竞技的时候把鼻子弄断
22:51
since I broke my nose in the high school rodeo."
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就再也没能用它呼吸过。
22:54
Thank you.
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谢谢大家。
22:56
(Applause)
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（掌声）
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Anna Deavere Smith - Actor, playwright, social criticAnna Deavere Smith's ground-breaking solo shows blur the lines between theater and journalism, using text from real-life encounters to create gripping portraits.
Why you should listen
Hailed by Newsweek as "the most exciting individual in American theater," Anna Deavere Smith uses solo performance as a public medium to explore issues of race, identity and community in America. Her grandfather once told her, "Say a word often enough, and it becomes you."
Inspired by this and Walt Whitman's idea "to absorb America," Deavere Smith began interviewing people (more than 2,000 now) across the country some 20 years ago. Without props, sets or costumes, she translates those encounters into profound performances, each drawing verbatim from the original recorded interview. She has an uncanny ability to inhabit the characters -- or rather the people -- she's representing onstage, regardless of their race, gender or age. And while her approach to cultural commentary is now widely imitated, she remains the master of the form. Her play, Let Me Down Easy, premiered this year at the Long Wharf Theater.
Deavere Smith is perhaps best known for her examination of race relations, having written and performed Fires in the Mirror, a raw view of those affected by the Crown Heights riots of 1991, and Twilight: Los Angeles, which tackled the 1992 Los Angeles riots. Along the way, she's earned two Obies, a MacArthur "genius" grant, and several Tony nominations, while also teaching at Stanford and NYU, and roles on such shows as The West Wing and HBO's Life Support. Her most recent book is Letters to a Young Artist: Straight Up Advice on Making a Life in the Arts, and she is the founding director of the Institute on the Arts and Civic Dialogue, a group that brings together artists to make works about social change.
Anna Deavere Smith | Speaker | TED.com