Adam Galinsky: How to speak up for yourself
Adam Galinsky - Social psychologist
Adam Galinsky teaches people all over the world how to inspire others, speak up effectively, lead teams and negotiate successfully. Full bio
of this phrase exactly one month ago,
when we got home from the hospital,
enough nutrients from breastfeeding.
to make a bad first impression
the next day,
because he was pretty dehydrated.
we can always contact her.
when we shouldn't,
when I let my twin brother down.
is a documentary filmmaker,
from a distribution company.
about this dilemma of speaking up:
are varied and diverse,
a universal tapestry.
when they make a mistake?
who keeps stepping on my toes?
my deepest insecurities?
I've come to recognize
a range of acceptable behavior.
we push ourselves too much.
his range of acceptable behavior.
we get punished in a variety of ways.
or even ostracized.
or that promotion or that deal.
our range isn't fixed;
based on the context.
that range more than anything else,
in the form of alternatives.
to a country, like an immigrant,
and someone's the subordinate.
than the other person.
we have lots of power,
our range narrows,
the low-power double bind.
we go unnoticed,
the phrase the "double bind"
and that's gender.
who don't speak up go unnoticed,
the same need as men to speak up,
over the last two decades
like a gender difference
differences in disguise.
between a man and a woman
There's something fundamentally different
for many sex differences
means that we have a narrow range,
to expand our range.
two things really matter.
in your own eyes.
in the eyes of others.
our range of acceptable behavior.
a set of tools today.
your risk of speaking up.
got discovered in negotiations
less ambitions offers
at the bargaining table.
and Emily Amanatullah have discovered
where women get the same outcomes as men
and expand it in their own mind.
"the mama bear effect."
we can discover our own voice.
to advocate for ourselves.
we have to advocate for ourselves
through the eyes of another person.
we have to expand our range.
what I really want.
your hand just like this:
a capital letter E on your forehead
draw this E in one of two ways,
as a test of perspective-taking.
an E to another person.
from someone else's vantage point.
is the self-focused E.
self-focused in a crisis.
about a particular crisis.
in Watsonville, California.
up with a bomb."
didn't give him the money.
is going to be evicted
to rob the bank --
fill out the paperwork."
defused a volatile situation.
and assertive, but still be likable.
but still be likable,
and you want to sell someone a car.
if you give them two options.
and a five-year warranty.
people a choice among options,
to accept your offer.
work with salespeople;
and rejected everything.
had a brilliant idea.
and without resistance.
around the world
in my audience; when I have allies."
and the eyes of others,
especially in high places,
they like us because we flatter them,
another double bind.
about one of our accomplishments,
in their eyes but also be likeable.
when I have been forewarned
the advice to come ask me for advice.
three things about this:
to come ask me for advice.
on the strategic benefits
because they asked for advice.
more confident speaking up
we already have credibility.
we don't have the credibility.
we can come across as an expert
to go up to friend of theirs
a passion of yours to me."
about the other person
hands were coming at me."
with a little higher pitch."
as if telling me a secret."
as you listened to their passion?"
in our own eyes, to speak up,
from others to speak up.
when we come across as too weak.
at work when they shed tears.
we frame our strong emotions as passion,
disappears for both men and women.
from my late father
passion was cinema,
for my brother's wedding
in the human comedy.
and enriching your performance.
and work to improve their performance
ranges and roles in this world.
the essence of this talk:
expanding and evolving.
can use these tools --
of acceptable behavior,
About the speaker:Adam Galinsky - Social psychologist
Adam Galinsky teaches people all over the world how to inspire others, speak up effectively, lead teams and negotiate successfully.
Why you should listen
Adam Galinsky is currently the chair of the management division at Columbia Business School. He co-authored the critically acclaimed and best-selling book, Friend & Foe, which distills his two decades of research on leadership, negotiations, diversity, decision-making and ethics. The New York Times says the book performed "a significant public service" and the Financial Times declared that Friend & Foe "fulfills its promise of handing the reader tools to be a better friend and a more formidable foe."
Galinsky has received numerous national and international awards for his teaching and research. He is only the second psychologist to ever to receive the two most important mid-career Awards in Social Psychology. In 2015, he was named one of the top 50 Thinkers on Talent by Thinkers50. In recognition of the quality of his teaching and research, he was selected as one of the World's 50 Best B-School Professors by Poets and Quants (2012).
Galinsky has consulted with and conducted executive workshops for clients across the globe, including Fortune 100 firms, non-profits and local and national governments. He has served as a legal expert in multiple defamation lawsuits, including a trial where he was the sole expert witness for a plaintiff awarded $37 million in damages.
Outside of his professional life, Galinsky is the associate producer on four award-winning documentaries, including Horns and Halos and Battle for Brooklyn, which were both short-listed for Best Documentary at the Academy Awards.
Adam Galinsky | Speaker | TED.com