ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Dessa - Rapper, singer and writer
Dessa is an internationally touring rapper, singer and writer who built a career by defying genre conventions and audience expectations.

Why you should listen

As a writer, Dessa has contributed to the New York Times, National Geographic Traveler and literary journals across the United States. As a musician, she's recorded critically acclaimed studio albums, co-composed for a 100-voice choir, collaborated with full orchestras and contributed to The Hamilton Mixtape on the invitation of Lin-Manuel Miranda. 

On stage and on the page, Dessa's work is driven by an interest in finding unexpected connections -- between heartache and neuroscience, aerodynamics and grief, or simply between two people who live far away and in disparate circumstances. Her delivery is crafted to balance wit and tenderness, intellectual rigor and a poetic sensibility.  

Dessa started out in Minneapolis, Minnesota as a member of the Doomtree hip-hop crew, a tight-knit group known for their explosive live shows, innovative sound and fiercely independent business model. For years, the seven-member crew shared stages, hotel rooms and head colds building an international following one sweaty show at a time. Dessa's work within the collective and as a solo artist earned several entries on the Billboard Top 200 charts (Chime, Parts of Speech and All Hands). Alone or with Doomtree, she's performed at Lollapalooza, Glastonbury, SXSW, velvet-lined theaters in LA and New York, punk venues in Central Europe, black box rooms from Tijuana to Beijing and once while standing on a wooden chair in South Africa. According to the LA Times, Dessa "sounds like no one else" and was called "a national treasure" by NPR's All Songs Considered.

Since her teenage years, however, Dessa wanted to become a published writer. So while recording and touring as a musician, she continued to write poetry, essays and short stories. Under the Doomtree banner, she began printing short books, some barely larger than a matchbook. In 2013, Doomtree Press published Spiral Bound, a collection of poetry and prose. In 2015, Dessa partnered with Rain Taxi on a poetry chapbook titled A Pound of Steam. On the strength of that collection, a New York literary agent telephoned; within a few years, Dutton Books (Penguin Random House) published her first book-length collection of essays, My Own Devices: True Stories from the Road on Music, Science, and Senseless Love, named one of the best books of 2018 by both NPR and Amazon. She also became a frequent radio contributor: on behalf of Minnesota Public Radio, she's interviewed best-selling authors in front of live audiences (most recently talking with Michael Pollan about his exploration into psychedelic drugs). At WNYC's The Greene Space, she served as Artist in Residence, designing a series called HEARTBREAKERS that investigated research on love, sex and determinism with both scientists and musicians.  

In recent years, Dessa partnered with the Grammy-winning Minnesota Orchestra to stage six sold-out performances at Minneapolis's Orchestra Hall (all arranged by composer/musician Andy Thompson and conducted by Sarah Hicks). The Minnesota Orchestra and Dessa cut a live record together in March of 2019, Sound the Bells: Recorded Live at Orchestra Hall, slated for release in November of 2019.

More profile about the speaker
Dessa | Speaker | TED.com
TEDxWanChai

Dessa: Can we choose to fall out of love?

Desa (Dessa): Možemo li da odaberemo da više ne budemo zaljubljeni u nekog?

Filmed:
2,063,007 views

Koji je najbolji način da prebolite slomljeno srce? Reperka i spisateljica Desa je osmislila nekonvencionalan pristup nakon što je odgledala TED govor Helen Fišer o mozgovima zaljubljenih. U sarkastično-smešnom govoru, opisuje kako je radila sa neuronaučnicima kako bi navela mozak da prestane da voli njenog bivšeg momka - i deli sa nama mudrost o romansi koju je usput stekla.
- Rapper, singer and writer
Dessa is an internationally touring rapper, singer and writer who built a career by defying genre conventions and audience expectations. Full bio

Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.

00:12
HelloZdravo, my nameиме is DessaDessa,
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Zdravo, zovem se Desa
00:14
and I'm a memberчлан of a hip-hopХип Хоп
collectiveколектив calledпозвани DoomtreeDoomabla.
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i članica sam hip-hop kolektiva
pod nazivom Doomtree.
00:18
I'm the one in the tankрезервоар topврх.
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Ja sam ona u majici na bretele.
00:20
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
00:22
And I make my livingживи as a performingизвођење,
touringтоуринг rapperreper and singerпевачица.
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Zarađujem za život kao izvođač,
reperka i pevačica.
00:27
When we performизводити as a collectiveколектив,
this is what our showsпоказује look like.
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Kada nastupamo kao kolektiv,
ovako naši nastupi izgledaju.
00:30
I'm the one in the bootsчизме.
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Ja sam ona u čizmama.
00:32
There's a lot of jumpingскакање.
There's a lot of sweatingznojenje.
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Bude tu dosta skakanja, dosta znojenja.
00:35
It's loudгласно. It's very high-energyVisokoenergetski.
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Glasno je. Izuzetno energično.
00:37
SometimesPonekad there are
unintentionalnenamerni bodyтело checksčekove onstagena sceni.
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Ponekad bude nenamernih
telesnih kontakata na sceni.
00:40
SometimesPonekad there are completelyу потпуности
intentionalнамерно bodyтело checksčekove onstagena sceni.
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Ponekad bude skroz namernih
telesnih kontakata na sceni.
00:44
It's kindкинд of a hybridхибрид betweenизмеђу
an intramuralљkolska hockeyхокеј gameигра and a concertконцерт.
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Radi se o hibridu između
lokalnih mečeva u hokeju i koncerata.
00:50
HoweverMeđutim, when I performизводити
my ownвластити musicмузика as a solosolo artistуметник,
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Međutim, kada izvodim
sopstvenu muziku kao solista,
00:53
I tendтенденција to gravitateгравитирају towardsка
more melancholymelanholije soundsзвуци.
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nekako više naginjem
melanholičnijim zvucima.
00:56
A fewнеколико yearsгодине agoпре, I gaveдала my momмама
the roughгрубо mixesмикес of a newново albumалбум,
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Pre nekoliko godina, dala sam majci
neobrađene mikseve novog albuma,
01:00
and she said, "BabyBeba, it's beautifulЛепа,
but why is it always so sadтужно?"
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a ona je rekla: „Dušo, prelepo je,
ali zašto je uvek tako tužno?”
01:05
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
01:06
"You always make musicмузика to bleedkrvarenje out to."
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„Uvek praviš muziku na koju se seku vene.”
01:09
And I thought, "Who are you hangingвешање
out with that you know that phraseфраза?"
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I pomislila sam: „S kim se družiš
pa znaš za taj izraz?”
(Smeh)
01:12
(LaughterSmeh)
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01:14
But over the courseкурс of my careerкаријера,
I've writtenнаписано so manyмноги sadтужно love songsпесме
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Međutim, tokom karijere, napisala sam
toliko tužnih ljubavnih pesama
01:18
that I got messagesпоруке like this from fansfanovi:
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da sam dobijala sledeće poruke od fanova:
01:19
"ReleasePuštanje newново musicмузика or a bookкњига.
I need help with my breakupraskid."
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„Objavi novu muziku ili knjigu.
Treba mi pomoć zbog raskida.”
01:22
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
01:26
And after performingизвођење and recordingснимање
and touringтоуринг those songsпесме for a long time,
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I izvodeći, snimajući i putujući
sa tim pesmama dugo vremena,
01:30
I foundнашао myselfЈа сам in a positionпозиција
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zatekla sam se u situaciji
01:33
in whichкоја my professionalпрофесионално nichesvoje mesto
was essentiallyУ суштини romanticромантичан devastationrazaranje.
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u kojoj je moja profesionalna niša
u suštini bio ljubavni očaj.
01:39
What I hadn'tније been publicјавно about, howeverМеђутим,
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Međutim, nisam javno govorila
01:41
was the factчињеница that mostнајвише of these songsпесме
had been writtenнаписано about the sameисти guy.
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o činjenici da je većina ovih pesama
napisana o istom momku.
01:45
And for two yearsгодине, we triedПокушали
to sortврста ourselvesсами out,
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Dve godine smo pokušavali
da izgladimo stvari,
01:49
and then for fiveпет
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a onda pet,
01:51
and on and off for 10.
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a onda još deset uz prekide.
01:53
And I was not only heartbrokenslomljeno srce,
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I ne samo da mi je srce bilo slomljeno,
01:56
but I was kindкинд of embarrassedсрамота
that I couldn'tније могао reboundповратак
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već me je nekako bilo sramota
što ne mogu da se oporavim
02:00
from what other people seemedизгледало је
to recoverопоравити се from so regularlyredovno.
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od nečega od čega se čini
da se ljudi redovno oporavljaju.
02:06
And even thoughипак I knewзнала
it wasn'tније doing eitherили of us any good,
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I iako sam znala da to nije dobro
ni za jedno od nas,
02:09
I just couldn'tније могао figureфигура out
how to put the love down.
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prosto nisam mogla da otkrijem
kako da ugasim ljubav.
A onda, ispijajući belo vino jedne noći,
02:15
Then, drinkingпити whiteбео wineвино one night,
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02:17
I saw a TEDTED Talk by a womanжена
namedназван DrDr. HelenHelen FisherFisher,
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odgledala sam TED govor
žene po imenu dr Helen Fišer,
02:20
and she said that in her work, she'dона би
been ableу могуцности to mapМапа the coordinatesкоординате of love
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a ona je rekla kako je u njenom radu
uspela da ocrta koordinate ljubavi
02:25
in the humanљудско brainмозак.
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u ljudskom mozgu.
02:26
And I thought, well,
if I could find my love in my brainмозак,
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Pa sam pomislila, dakle,
ako bih pronašla ljubav u mom mozgu,
možda bih uspela da je iščupam.
02:30
maybe I could get it out.
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02:32
So I wentотишао to TwitterTwitter-a.
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Pa sam se obratila Tviteru.
02:34
"AnybodyNikoga got accessприступ to an fMRIfMRI labлаб,
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„Da li neko ima pristup
magnetnoj rezonanci,
02:36
like at midnightponoć or something?
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npr. usred noći ili slično?
02:37
I'll tradeтрговина for backstageиза бине
passesпролази and whiskeyвиски."
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Trampićemo se
za prolaz iza scene i viski.”
02:40
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
02:42
And that's DrDr. CherylCheryl OlmanOlmane,
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A ovo je dr Šeril Olman,
02:43
who worksИзвођење радова at the UniversityUniverzitet of Minnesota'sMinesote
CenterCentar for MagneticMagnetni ResonanceRezonanca ResearchIstraživanje.
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ona radi na Univerzitetu Minesota
u Centru za istraživanja
magnetnom rezonancom.
02:47
She tookузела me up on it.
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Prihvatila je moj zahtev.
02:49
I explainedобјаснио је DrDr. Fisher'sFišer protocolпротокол,
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Objasnila sam dr Fišerin protokol
02:52
and we decidedодлучио to recreatestvori it
with a sampleузорак sizeвеличине of one, me.
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i odlučile smo da ga ponovimo
na uzorku od jedne osobe: mene.
02:56
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
02:57
So I got deckedposebnoj svečanoj out in a pairпар
of forestшума greenзелен scrubsuniforma,
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Navukli su mi bolničku uniformu
šumskozelene boje,
položili me na nosiljku
03:03
and I was laidположено on a gurneyгурнеи
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03:05
and wheeledна колесима into an fMRIfMRI machineмашина.
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i odgurali u magnetnu rezonancu.
03:07
If you're unfamiliarNepoznata with that technologyтехнологија,
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Ako niste upoznati sa tehnologijom,
03:09
essentiallyУ суштини, an fMRIfMRI machineмашина
is a bigвелики, tubularCevasti magnetmagnet
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u suštini, magnetna rezonanca
je veliki magnet u obliku tube
03:12
that tracksтрацкс the progressнапредак
of deoxygenateddeoksidovanu ironгвожђе in your bloodкрв.
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koji prati kretanje
deoksidizovanog železa u vašoj krvi.
03:17
So it's essentiallyУ суштини figuringфигуринг out
what partsделови of your brainмозак
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Dakle, u suštini otkriva
koji delovi vašeg mozga
03:19
are makingстварање the biggestнајвеће metabolicmetabolička demandпотражња
at any givenдато momentтренутак.
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su metabolički najzahtevniji
u bilo kom trenutku.
03:22
And in that way, it can figureфигура out
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I na taj način može da otkrije
koje strukture su povezane
sa određenim zadatkom,
03:24
whichкоја structuresструктуре
are associatedповезани with a taskзадатак,
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03:26
like tappingтапкање your fingerпрст, for exampleпример,
will always lightсветло up the sameисти regionрегион,
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na primer, lupkanje prstom
će uvek da osvetli istu oblast,
ili u mom slučaju,
03:30
or in my caseслучај,
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03:31
looking at picturesслике of your ex-boyfriendIjubav
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posmatranje slika bivšeg momka,
03:34
and then looking at picturesслике of a dudeBrate
who just sortврста of resembledliиio na my ex-boyfriendIjubav
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a onda posmatranje slika nekog lika
koji nekako liči na mog bivšeg,
03:38
but for whomкога I had no strongјак feelingsосећања.
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ali prema kome nemam snažna osećanja.
03:40
He was the controlконтрола.
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On je bio kontrolni subjekt.
03:41
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
03:43
And when I left the machineмашина,
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A kad sam napustila mašinu,
03:45
we had these really
high-resolutionвисоке резолуције imagesслике of my brainмозак.
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imali smo slike mog mozga
u izuzetno visokoj rezoluciji.
03:50
We could cleaverascepiti the two halvesполовина apartодвојено.
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Mogli smo da rascepimo dve polovine.
03:53
We could inflatenaduvavaju the cortexкортекс to see
insideу all of the wrinklesBora, essentiallyУ суштини,
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Mogli smo da naduvamo korteks i u suštini
pogledamo sve nabore u unutrašnjosti,
03:59
in a viewпоглед that DrDr. CherylCheryl OlmanOlmane
calledпозвани the "brainмозак skinкожа rugtepih."
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u prizoru koji je dr Šeril Olman
nazvala „krzneni tepih”.
04:02
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
04:04
And we could see how my brainмозак had behavedse poneo
when I lookedпогледао at imagesслике of bothи једно и друго menмушкарци.
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Mogli smo da vidimo kako se ponaša
moj mozak kad gledam slike oba muškarca.
04:11
And this was importantважно.
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A ovo je bilo važno.
04:12
We could trackтрацк all of the activityактивност
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Mogli smo da pratimo sve aktivnosti
kada sam posmatrala kontrolnog subjekta
i kada sam posmatrala bivšeg,
04:15
when I lookedпогледао at the controlконтрола
and when I lookedпогледао at my exBivša,
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04:18
and it was in comparingпоредећи these dataподаци setsсетови
that we'dми смо be ableу могуцности to find the love aloneсами,
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a upoređujući ove skupove podataka,
mogli smo da otkrijemo samu ljubav,
04:22
in the sameисти way that, if I were
to stepкорак on a scaleСкала fullyпотпуно dressedобучен
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na isti način kao što bi,
ako bih stala na vagu obučena,
04:26
and then stepкорак on it again nakedгола,
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a onda ponovo stala na nju gola,
04:29
the differenceразлика betweenизмеђу those numbersбројеви
would be the weightтежина of my clothingодећа.
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razlika između tih brojki
bi bila težina moje odeće.
04:32
So when we did that dataподаци comparisonпоређење,
we subtractedодузети one from the other,
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Pa kad smo uporedili podatke
i oduzeli jedne od drugih,
04:36
we foundнашао activityактивност in exactlyбаш тако the regionsрегије
that DrDr. FisherFisher would have predictedпредвидјено.
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otkrili smo aktivnost baš u onim oblastima
koje je dr Fišer predskazala.
04:42
That's me.
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To sam ja.
04:44
And that's my brainмозак in love.
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A to je moj mozak kad je zaljubljen.
04:47
There was activityактивност in that little
orangeнаранџаста dotтачка, the ventralventralne tegmentaltegmentalnog areaподручје,
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Aktivnost se nalazila u toj
malenoj narandžastoj tački,
ventralno-tegmentalnom području,
04:50
that kindкинд of loopпетља of redцрвена
is the anteriorprednje cingulatesingularni
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ta nekakva crvena petlja
je anteriorni cingularni korteks,
04:54
and that goldenзлатни setкомплет of hornsrogovi
is the caudatescaudates.
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a taj zlatni par rogova je kaudat.
04:59
After she had had time to analyzeанализирај
the dataподаци with her teamтим
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Nakon što je analizirala
podatke sa svojom ekipom
i partnerima, Andreom i Filom,
05:02
and a coupleпар of partnersпартнери, AndreaAndrea and PhilFil,
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05:04
CherylCheryl sentпослат me an imageслика, a singleједно slideклизање.
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Šeril mi je poslala sliku,
samo jedan slajd.
05:08
It was my brainмозак in crossкрст sectionодељак,
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Radilo se o poprečnom preseku mog mozga,
05:11
with one brightсветао dotтачка of activityактивност
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sa svetlom aktivnom tačkom
05:13
that representedzastupljena
my feelingsосећања for this dudeBrate.
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koja je predstavljala
moja osećanja prema tom momku.
05:18
And I'd knownпознат I was in love,
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Ja sam znala da sam zaljubljena,
05:20
and that's the wholeцела reasonразлог
I was going to these outrageousизузетно lengthstako daleko.
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to je čitav razlog zašto sam se zaputila
ovoliko nečuveno daleko.
05:23
But havingимати an imageслика that provedдоказано it
feltосетио like suchтаква a vindicationopravdanje,
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Ali to što sam imala sliku kao dokaz
se činilo kao potvrda,
05:28
like, "Yeah, it's all in my headглава,
but now I know exactlyбаш тако where."
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kao: „Da, sve je u mojoj glavi,
ali sad znam i tačno gde.”
05:31
(LaughterSmeh)
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(Smeh)
05:35
And I alsoтакође feltосетио like an assassinatentator
who had her markмарк.
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I osećala sam se kao ubica
koji je naciljao svoju metu.
05:39
That was what I had to annihilateuniљtite.
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To sam morala da uništim.
05:42
So I decidedодлучио to embarkupustimo
on a courseкурс of treatmentтретман
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Pa sam odlučila
da se podvrgnem tretmanu
05:46
calledпозвани "neurofeedbackneuropovratna informacija."
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koji se naziva „neuroterapija”.
05:49
I workedрадио је with a womanжена namedназван
PenijeanPenijean GracefireGracefire,
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Radila sam sa ženom
po imenu Penidžin Grejsfajer
05:52
and she explainedобјаснио је that what we'dми смо be doing
was trainingобука my brainмозак.
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i ona mi je objasnila
da treniramo moj mozak.
05:56
We're not lobotomizinglobotomizacija anything.
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Ne radimo nikakvu lobotomiju.
05:58
We're trainingобука it in the way
that we would trainвоз a muscleмишић,
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Treniramo ga na isti način
kao što bismo trenirali mišić
06:01
so that it would be flexibleфлексибилан enoughдовољно
and resilientotporna enoughдовољно
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kako bi postao dovoljno fleksibilan
i dovoljno otporan
06:04
to respondодговори appropriatelyодговарајуће
to my circumstancesоколности.
112
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da odgovori na pravi način
na moje okolnosti.
Dakle, kada smo na pokretnoj traci,
06:07
So when we're on the treadmillopterecenja,
we would anticipateочекивати
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očekujemo da će srce da nam lupa i udara,
06:10
that our heartсрце would beatпобедити and poundфунта,
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06:13
and when we're asleepзаспао,
we would askпитати that that muscleмишић slowспор.
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a kada spavamo, zahtevamo
da taj mišić uspori.
06:17
SimilarlyNa sličan način, when I'm in a long-termдугорочни,
viableодржив, lovingљубави romanticромантичан relationshipоднос,
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Slično, kada sam u dugoj,
održivoj, privrženoj ljubavnoj vezi,
centri za osećanja u mom mozgu
bi trebalo da budu angažovani,
06:21
the emotionalемоционално centersцентри
of my brainмозак should engageангажовати,
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2724
06:24
and when I'm not in a long-termдугорочни,
viableодржив, emotionalемоционално, lovingљубави relationshipоднос,
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a kada nisam u dugoj, održivoj,
privrženoj ljubavnoj vezi,
06:28
they should eventuallyконачно chillSmiri se out.
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trebalo bi vremenom da se ugase.
06:32
So she cameДошао over with a setкомплет of electrodesелектроде
just smallerмањи than a dimedeset centi
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Pa je navratila sa kompletom elektroda
nešto manjih od novčića,
06:37
that were sensitiveосетљив enoughдовољно
to detectоткрити my brainwavesmoћdani
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dovoljno osetljivih
da detektuju moždane talase
06:39
throughкроз my boneкост and hairкоса and scalpскалп.
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kroz moje kosti, kosu i lobanju.
06:42
And when she riggedопремљени me up,
I could see my brainмозак workingрад in realправи time.
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A kada me je priključila, videla sam
kako moj mozak radi u realnom vremenu.
A na drugom snimku koji mi je pokazala,
06:49
And in anotherдруги viewпоглед that she showedпоказао me,
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1950
06:51
I could see exactlyбаш тако whichкоја partsделови
of my brainмозак were hyperactivehiperaktivan,
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mogla sam da vidim tačno
koji delovi mog mozga su hiperaktivni,
06:55
here displayedприказати in redцрвена;
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ovde u crvenoj boji;
06:56
hypoactivehipotekaktivni, here displayedприказати in blueПлави;
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hipoaktivni su prikazani u plavoj boji;
06:58
and the healthyздрав thresholdпраг of behaviorпонашање,
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3214
a zdravi prag ponašanja,
07:01
the greenзелен zoneзоне, the GoldilocksZlatokosa zoneзоне,
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zelena zona je zona Zlatokose,
07:04
whichкоја is where I wanted to go.
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gde sam želela da stignem.
07:05
And we can, in factчињеница, isolateизолат
just those partsделови of my brainмозак
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I, zapravo, možemo da izolujemo
samo one delove mozga
07:08
that were associatedповезани
with the romanticромантичан regulationрегулација
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koji su povezani
sa regulacijom zaljubljenosti,
07:11
that we'dми смо identifiedидентификовани in the FisherFisher studyстудија.
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koje smo identifikovali
u Fišerinoj studiji.
07:14
So PenijeanPenijean, severalнеколико timesпута,
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Penidžin me je nekoliko puta
07:19
hookedзакачен me up with all her electrodesелектроде,
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zakačila na elektrode
07:22
and she explainedобјаснио је that I didn't
have to do or think anything.
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i objasnila mi je da ne moram
da radim niti mislim o bilo čemu.
07:25
I just essentiallyУ суштини
had to holdдржати prettyприлично still
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U suštini je trebalo da budem mirna,
07:28
and stayостани awakebudan
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ostanem budna
07:30
and watch.
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i posmatram.
07:33
(HarpHarfu and vibraphonevibraphone soundsзвуци playигра)
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(Zvuk harfe i vibrafona)
07:37
So I did.
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Tako sam i postupila.
07:39
And everyсваки time my brainмозак operatedуправља
in that healthyздрав thresholdпраг,
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2959
A svaki put kad bi moj mozak radio
u zdravim granicama,
07:42
I got a little runтрцати of harpharfa
or vibraphonevibraphone musicмузика.
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čula bih na kratko
zvuk harfe ili vibrafona.
07:48
And I just watchedгледао my brainмозак rotateротирати
at roughlyгрубо the speedбрзина of a gyroGyro machineмашина
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A ja sam prosto posmatrala svoj mozak
kako se rotira otprilike brzinom žiroskopa
07:52
on my dad'sТата је flat-screentelevizor TVTV.
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1918
na ravnom TV ekranu mog oca.
07:55
And that was counterintuitiveodobravaju.
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A to nije bilo logično.
07:57
She said the learningучење would be
essentiallyУ суштини unconsciousнесвестан.
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Rekla je kako će učenje
u suštini da bude nesvesno.
Međutim, onda sam mislila
na druge stvari koje sam naučila
07:59
But then I thought about
the other things I had learnedнаучио
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08:02
withoutбез activelyактивно engagingангажовање
my consciousсвесна mindум.
149
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bez aktivnog učešća mog svesnog uma.
08:04
When you rideвози a bikeбицикл,
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Kada vozite bicikl,
08:06
I don't really know what, like,
my left calftele muscleмишић is doing,
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ne znam šta, na primer,
mišić mog levog lista radi
08:10
or how my latissimuslatissimus dorsiDorsi knowsзна
to engageангажовати when I wobbleваловање to the right.
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ili kako moj leđni mišić zna
kako da reaguje kada se nagnem desno.
08:13
The bodyтело just learnsuči.
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1200
Telo prosto nauči.
08:15
And similarlyслично, Pavlov'sPavlova dogsпси probablyвероватно
don't know a lot about, like,
154
483116
4117
I slično, Pavlovljevi psi verovatno
ne znaju mnogo, na primer,
08:19
proteinбеланчевина structuresструктуре
or the waveformtalasnog oblika of a ringingzvoni bellзвоно,
155
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o strukturi proteina
ili obliku talasa zvuka zvona,
08:23
but they salivatesalivate nonethelessипак
because the bodyтело pairedu paru the stimulistimulansa.
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ali ipak luče pljuvačku
jer je telo spojilo stimulanse.
08:27
FinishedZavrљio the sessionsсесије,
157
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Završila sam seanse,
08:29
wentотишао back to DrDr. CherylCheryl
Olman'sOlman fMRIfMRI machineмашина,
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otišla do magnetne rezonance
doktorice Šeril Olman,
08:33
and we repeatedпоновио the protocolпротокол,
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pa smo ponovili protokol,
08:34
the sameисти imagesслике --
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iste slike -
08:36
of the exBivša, of the controlконтрола and,
in the interestинтерес of scientificнаучно rigorригор,
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bivšeg, kontrolnog i,
zarad naučne verodostojnosti,
Šeril i njena ekipa
nisu znali koja je čija slika,
08:40
CherylCheryl and her teamтим
didn't know who was who,
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2231
08:43
so that they couldn'tније могао
influenceутицај the resultsрезултате.
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kako ne bi mogli da utiču na rezultate.
08:47
And after she had time
to analyzeанализирај that secondдруго setкомплет of dataподаци,
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I kada je našla vremena
da izanalizira drugi skup podataka,
08:51
she sentпослат me that imageслика.
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poslala mi je tu sliku.
08:53
She said,
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Rekla je:
08:55
"DudeBrate A'sPetice dominanceдоминанце of your brainмозак
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„Dominacija momka A u tvom mozgu
08:58
seemsИзгледа to essentiallyУ суштини have been eradicatedискорењен.
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je u suštini iskorenjena.
09:00
I think this is the desiredželjeni resultрезултат,"
commazarez, yes, questionпитање markмарк.
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Verujem da je ovo željeni rezultat”,
zarez, da, upitnik.
09:04
(LaughterSmeh)
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2379
(Smeh)
09:07
And that was the exactlyбаш тако
the desiredželjeni resultрезултат.
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A to je upravo bio željeni rezultat.
09:10
And finallyконачно, I allowedдозвољен myselfЈа сам
a momentтренутак to introspectintrospect,
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Naposletku, dozvolila sam sebi
trenutak introspekcije,
09:13
like, how did I feel?
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na primer, kako sam se osećala.
09:17
And in one way, it feltосетио like
174
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A na neki način, osećala sam
09:20
it was the sameисти inventoryинвентар of feelingsосећања
that I'd had at the outsetpočetka.
175
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kao da imam isti dijapazon osećanja
koja sam imala na početku.
09:24
This isn't "EternalVeиni SunshineSunce
of the SpotlessBesprekoran MindUm."
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Ne radi se o „Večnom sjaju
besprekornog uma”.
09:26
The dudeBrate wasn'tније a strangerстранац.
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Momak nije sad bio stranac.
09:28
But I'd had love and jealousyljubomora
and amityAmity and attractionатракција and respectпоштовање
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Međutim, gajila sam ljubav, ljubomoru,
naklonost, privlačnost, poštovanje
09:35
and all those complicatedкомпликован feelingsосећања
that you amassstvori after long-termдугорочни love.
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i sva ta složena osećanja
koja se nagomilaju nakon duge veze.
09:40
But it feltосетио like the benevolentдобронамерно feelingsосећања
had risenporasle to the surfaceповршина,
180
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Međutim, činilo se kao da su pozitivna
osećanja isplivala na površinu,
09:46
and the feelingsосећања of fixationfiksacije
and the less-generousmanje velikodušno feelingsосећања
181
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a da osećanja opsednutosti,
kao i ona manje zahvalna osećanja
09:52
weren'tнису quiteприлично so presentпоклон.
182
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nisu više toliko prisutna.
A to se čini kao sitnica na neki način,
09:54
And that soundsзвуци like
a smallмали thing in some way,
183
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ovaj novi poredak osećanja,
09:56
this resequencingpreraspoređne redosleda of feelingsосећања,
184
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ali meni se činilo kao ogromna stvar.
09:58
but to me it feltосетио like the biggestнајвеће thing.
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10:00
Like, if I told you,
186
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Kao, ako bih vam rekla:
10:02
"I'm going to anesthetizeuspavali you,
187
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2000
„Daću vam anesteziju,
10:04
and I'm alsoтакође going to take out
your wisdomмудрост teethзуби,"
188
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2626
ali ću vam takođe izvaditi umnjake."
10:07
it would really matterматерија to you the sequenceниз
in whichкоја I did those two things.
189
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Zaista bi vam bio važan redosled
po kom ću da obavim te dve stvari.
10:10
(LaughterSmeh)
190
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(Smeh)
10:14
And I alsoтакође feltосетио like
191
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Takođe sam osećala
10:16
I'd had this really unusualнеобично
philosophicalфилозофски privilegeпривилегија
192
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da sam imala krajnje neuobičajenu
filozofsku privilegiju
10:20
to understandРазумем love.
193
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da razumem ljubav.
10:24
The labлаб offeredпонуђени to 3D-printD-PRINT my caudatecaudat.
194
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Laboratorija je ponudila
da mi u 3D odštampaju kaudatu.
10:29
I got to holdдржати love in my handруку.
195
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2073
Mogla sam u ruci da držim ljubav.
10:31
(LaughterSmeh)
196
619455
1367
(Smeh)
Pa sam je izlila u bronzi,
10:33
And then I bronzedbronzane it,
197
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10:34
and I madeмаде it into a necklaceogrlica and soldпродат
it at the merchrobom tableсто at my showsпоказује.
198
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napravila ogrlicu od nje i prodavala je
na štandovima za suvenire na nastupima.
10:37
(LaughterSmeh)
199
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2782
(Smeh)
10:40
(ApplauseAplauz)
200
628693
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(Aplauz)
10:47
And then, with the help of a coupleпар
of friendsпријатељи back in MinneapolisMinneapolis,
201
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Onda, uz pomoć
par prijatelja iz Mineapolisa,
10:51
one of them BeckyBeki,
202
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jedna od njih je Beki,
10:53
we madeмаде an enormousогроман discodisko ballлопта of it --
203
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2571
napravili smo od toga
ogromnu disko kuglu -
10:55
(LaughterSmeh)
204
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(Smeh)
10:57
that could descendSpusti se
from the ceilingплафон at my bigвелики showsпоказује.
205
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koja se spuštala sa plafona
na mojim većim nastupima.
11:01
And I feltосетио like I'd had the opportunityприлика
to better understandРазумем love,
206
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3948
Osećala sam da mi je pružena prilika
da bolje razumem ljubav,
11:05
even the compulsivekompulzivni poremećaj partsделови.
207
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4187
čak i njene kompulzivne delove.
11:09
It isn't a neatуредан, symmetricalсиметрична
Valentine'sZa dan zaljubljenih heartсрце.
208
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Ljubav nije uredno, simetrično
Valentinovo srce.
11:12
It's bodilyтелесно, it's systemicсистемски,
209
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2134
Telesna je, sistemska,
11:15
it is a hideousодвратан pairпар of ram'sOvan je hornsrogovi
buriedпокопан somewhereнегде deepдубоко withinу склопу your skullЛобања,
210
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4996
ona je odvratni par ovnovih rogova
zakopanih negde duboko u vašoj lobanji.
11:20
and when that specialпосебан boyдечко walksшетње by,
211
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2320
A kada pravi dečko prođe pored vas,
11:22
it lightsсветла up,
212
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1429
zasvetli.
11:23
and if he likesсвиђа you back
and you make eachсваки other happyсрећан,
213
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Ako se i vi sviđate njemu
i usrećujete jedno drugo,
11:26
then you fanвентилатор the flamesпламен.
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1619
onda rasplamsate vatru.
11:28
And if he doesn't,
215
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1422
U suprotnom,
11:29
then you assembleсаставити a teamтим
of neuroscientistsNeurolozi su
216
677974
2051
okupite ekipu neuronaučnika
11:32
to snuffснуфф them out by forceсила.
217
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da je silom iščupaju.
11:33
(LaughterSmeh)
218
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1910
(Smeh)
11:35
ThanksHvala ti.
219
683641
1235
Hvala.
11:36
(ApplauseAplauz)
220
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(Aplauz)
Translated by Milenka Okuka
Reviewed by Ivana Krivokuća

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ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Dessa - Rapper, singer and writer
Dessa is an internationally touring rapper, singer and writer who built a career by defying genre conventions and audience expectations.

Why you should listen

As a writer, Dessa has contributed to the New York Times, National Geographic Traveler and literary journals across the United States. As a musician, she's recorded critically acclaimed studio albums, co-composed for a 100-voice choir, collaborated with full orchestras and contributed to The Hamilton Mixtape on the invitation of Lin-Manuel Miranda. 

On stage and on the page, Dessa's work is driven by an interest in finding unexpected connections -- between heartache and neuroscience, aerodynamics and grief, or simply between two people who live far away and in disparate circumstances. Her delivery is crafted to balance wit and tenderness, intellectual rigor and a poetic sensibility.  

Dessa started out in Minneapolis, Minnesota as a member of the Doomtree hip-hop crew, a tight-knit group known for their explosive live shows, innovative sound and fiercely independent business model. For years, the seven-member crew shared stages, hotel rooms and head colds building an international following one sweaty show at a time. Dessa's work within the collective and as a solo artist earned several entries on the Billboard Top 200 charts (Chime, Parts of Speech and All Hands). Alone or with Doomtree, she's performed at Lollapalooza, Glastonbury, SXSW, velvet-lined theaters in LA and New York, punk venues in Central Europe, black box rooms from Tijuana to Beijing and once while standing on a wooden chair in South Africa. According to the LA Times, Dessa "sounds like no one else" and was called "a national treasure" by NPR's All Songs Considered.

Since her teenage years, however, Dessa wanted to become a published writer. So while recording and touring as a musician, she continued to write poetry, essays and short stories. Under the Doomtree banner, she began printing short books, some barely larger than a matchbook. In 2013, Doomtree Press published Spiral Bound, a collection of poetry and prose. In 2015, Dessa partnered with Rain Taxi on a poetry chapbook titled A Pound of Steam. On the strength of that collection, a New York literary agent telephoned; within a few years, Dutton Books (Penguin Random House) published her first book-length collection of essays, My Own Devices: True Stories from the Road on Music, Science, and Senseless Love, named one of the best books of 2018 by both NPR and Amazon. She also became a frequent radio contributor: on behalf of Minnesota Public Radio, she's interviewed best-selling authors in front of live audiences (most recently talking with Michael Pollan about his exploration into psychedelic drugs). At WNYC's The Greene Space, she served as Artist in Residence, designing a series called HEARTBREAKERS that investigated research on love, sex and determinism with both scientists and musicians.  

In recent years, Dessa partnered with the Grammy-winning Minnesota Orchestra to stage six sold-out performances at Minneapolis's Orchestra Hall (all arranged by composer/musician Andy Thompson and conducted by Sarah Hicks). The Minnesota Orchestra and Dessa cut a live record together in March of 2019, Sound the Bells: Recorded Live at Orchestra Hall, slated for release in November of 2019.

More profile about the speaker
Dessa | Speaker | TED.com