ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Helen Fisher - Anthropologist, expert on love
Anthropologist Helen Fisher studies gender differences and the evolution of human emotions. She’s best known as an expert on romantic love.

Why you should listen

Fisher's several books lay bare the mysteries of our most treasured emotion: its evolution, its biochemical foundations and its vital importance to human society. Fisher describes love as a universal human drive (stronger than the sex drive; stronger than thirst or hunger; stronger perhaps than the will to live), and her many areas of inquiry shed light on timeless human mysteries like why we choose one partner over another. Her classic study, Anatomy of Love, first published in 1992, has just been re-issued in a fully updated edition, including her recent neuroimaging research on lust, romantic love and attachment as well as discussions of sexting, hooking up, friends with benefits, other contemporary trends in courtship and marriage, and a dramatic current trend she calls “slow love.”

More profile about the speaker
Helen Fisher | Speaker | TED.com
TED2006

Helen Fisher: Why we love, why we cheat

海倫費舍爾講愛與不忠

Filmed:
11,349,614 views

人類學家海倫費希爾同大家講一個棘手嘅話題 - 愛 - 並解釋其演變,佢嘅生化基礎同社會意義。她最後警告大家濫用抗抑鬱藥嘅潛在危機。
- Anthropologist, expert on love
Anthropologist Helen Fisher studies gender differences and the evolution of human emotions. She’s best known as an expert on romantic love. Full bio

Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.

今日我想跟大家講吓未來世紀兩個最大嘅社會趨勢
00:25
I'd like to talk today今日
about the two biggest最大 social社會 trends趨勢
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00:30
in the coming century世紀,
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00:31
and perhaps或者 in the next 10,000 years.
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或者會係未來一萬年嘅事。
但我想由我對浪漫愛情嘅研究講起
00:34
But I want to start初時
with my work on romantic浪漫 love,
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00:38
because that's my most recent最近 work.
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因為呢樣係我最近期嘅工作
我同我啲同事將32個瘋狂地戀愛緊嘅人
00:41
What I and my colleagues同事 did was put
32 people, who were madly in love,
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00:45
into a functional功能 MRIMri brain大腦 scanner掃描儀.
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放入一部大腦功能磁力共振掃描儀
其中17個相戀緊嘅人,佢哋嘅愛有被對方接受
00:48
17 who were madly in love
and their佢哋 love was accepted接受;
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其餘15個人都係瘋狂地愛緊,但佢哋啱啱被人拋棄
00:51
and 15 who were madly in love
and they had just been dumped.
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我想同你哋講呢件事先
00:54
And so I want to tell you
about that first,
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然後再講我覺得愛情會點樣發展
00:57
and then go on into where
I think love is going.
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01:01
(Laughter笑聲)
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01:03
"What 'tis' 提斯 to love?" Shakespeare莎士比亞 said.
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莎士比亞問「愛係乜嘢?」
我認為,我們嘅祖先 - 我認為人類一直都喺度思索呢個問題
01:07
I think our ancestors祖先 --
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01:09
I think human人類 beings生命 have been
wondering about this question個問題
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從他們在100萬年前,圍着營火而坐,觀看星際的時候開始
01:13
since因為 they sat around their佢哋 campfires營火
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01:15
or lay and watched
the stars星星 a million years ago.
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01:19
I started初時 out by trying試圖 to figure out
what romantic浪漫 love was
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我開始嘗試了解浪漫愛情係乜嘢
睇翻過去45年以來嘅研究 - 淨係關於心理學嘅研究
01:22
by looking at the last 45 years
of the psychological心理 research研究
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01:28
and as it turns輪流 out,
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我發現當人墜入愛河嘅時候,以下一系列嘅事會發生
01:29
there's a very specific特定 group of things
that happen發生 when you fall秋天 in love.
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首先發生嘅就是,我所講嘅
01:34
The first thing that happens發生 is,
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01:36
a person begins初時 to take on
what I call, "special特殊 meaning意義."
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一個人開始產生我所講嘅「特殊意義」
正如一位貨車司機曾經對我講
01:40
As a truck貨車 driver司機 once一旦 said to me,
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佢講:「世界有咗一個新嘅中心點,而呢個中心就係瑪麗安妮」
01:42
"The world世界 had a new新增功能 center中心,
and that center中心 was Mary瑪麗 Anne安妮."
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01:46
George喬治 Bernard伯纳德 Shaw said it differently不同.
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蕭伯納嘅講法有啲唔同
佢話:「愛情係高估咗一個女人同另一個女人之間嘅差別」
01:48
"Love consists of overestimating高估
the differences差異
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01:51
between之間 one woman女人 and another另一個."
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事實就係咁樣(眾笑)
01:53
And indeed講真, that's what we do.
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01:55
(Laughter笑聲)
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01:58
And then you just focus重點 on this person.
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然後你淨係集中喺呢個人身上
02:01
You can list列表 what you
don't like about them,
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你可以列出你唔喜歡佢地乜嘢
但你可以將呢啲嘢放理一邊,淨係專注你自己所做嘅嘢
02:04
but then you sweep that aside一邊
and focus重點 on what you do.
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02:07
As Chaucer乔叟 said, "Love is blind."
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正如喬叟講:「愛情係盲目嘅」
02:11
In trying試圖 to understand理解 romantic浪漫 love,
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為咗嘗試了解浪漫愛情
02:13
I decided決定 I would read poetry詩歌
from all over the world世界,
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我決定翻讀世界各地嘅詩歌韻文
02:16
and I just want to give
you one very short poem
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我想同你分享一段來自第八世紀中國嘅短詩
02:19
from eighth-century第八-世紀 China中國,
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佢將一個專注地鍾情於一個女人嘅男人描述得淋漓盡致
02:20
because it's an almost爭 D perfect完美 example例子
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02:22
of a man who is focused集中 totally完全
on a particular特定 woman女人.
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就好似當你瘋狂地愛上咗一個人
02:26
It's a little bit like when you are
madly in love with somebody有人
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當你入到一個停車場嘅時候
02:29
and you walk into a parking停車 lot --
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嗰個人部車同停車場入面嘅其他車係唔同嘅
02:31
their佢哋 car架車 is different不同
from every other car架車 in the parking停車 lot.
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就算係晚宴嘅時候,佢哋嘅酒杯都特別同宴會上其他人嘅酒杯唔同
02:34
Their佢哋 wine glass玻璃 at dinner晚餐
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02:36
is different不同 from every other wine glass玻璃
at the dinner晚餐 party.
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02:39
And in this case情況下, a man got hooked上癮
on a bamboo sleeping瞓覺 mat.
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而喺呢一首詩入面,一個男人對一張竹蓆情有獨鍾
呢首詩嘅作者係元稹,内容係
02:44
And it goes like this.
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02:45
It's by a guy called Yuan Zhen.
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「竹簟衬重茵,未忍都令卷
02:48
"I cannot唔可以 bear to put away
the bamboo sleeping瞓覺 mat.
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忆昨初来日,看君自施展」
02:51
The night I brought you home,
I watched you roll it out."
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他迷上咗嗰一張蓆
02:55
He became成為 hooked上癮 on a sleeping瞓覺 mat,
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可能係因為佢大腦嘅多巴胺提升咗
02:57
probably可能 because of elevated升高 activity活動
of dopamine多巴胺 in his brain大腦,
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就好似你同我一樣
03:00
just like with you and me.
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呢個人唔單只產生咗特別嘅意義
03:02
But anyway反正, not only does this person
take on special特殊 meaning意義,
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你會專注予他們
03:05
you focus重點 your attention注意 on them.
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03:07
You aggrandize誇大 them.
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你會誇大佢。而你會有強烈嘅能量
03:09
But you have intense激烈 energy能源.
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正如一位波利尼西亞人講,「我想喺天上面跳」
03:11
As one Polynesian波利尼西亞 said,
"I felt覺得 like jumping in the sky天空."
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你可以成晚唔瞓。你可以行路到天亮
03:15
You're up all night.
You're walking till直到 dawn黎明.
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事情進展順利嘅時候,你會覺得無比喜悅
03:18
You feel intense激烈 elation興高采烈
when things are going well;
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但當遇到任何唔如意嘅事,你嘅情緒可以波動到絕望同可怕嘅程度
03:21
mood心情 swings波動 into horrible可怕 despair絕望
when things are going poorly唔好.
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你會變得好依賴呢個人
03:24
Real真正 dependence依賴 on this person.
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正如一位喺紐約嘅商人對我講,佢話「佢鍾意乜,我就鍾意乜。」
03:27
As one businessman商人 in New新增功能 York約克 said to me,
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"Anything she liked中意, I liked中意."
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簡單。浪漫愛情是很簡單的。
03:32
Simple簡單. Romantic浪漫 love is very simple簡單.
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03:35
You become成為 extremely sexually possessive佔有.
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你嘅性佔有欲會變得好強
03:37
You know, if you're just sleeping瞓覺
with somebody有人 casually冇所謂,
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你知道,如果你隨便同一個人上床
03:40
you don't really care護理
if they're sleeping瞓覺 with somebody有人 else.
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你不會介意佢同其他人上床
但是,當你愛上一個人嘅時候
03:43
But the moment時刻 you fall秋天 in love,
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你對佢嘅性佔有欲會變得非常強烈
03:45
you become成為 extremely
sexually possessive佔有 of them.
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從達爾文理論來講,我認為這一點是有意義嘅
03:47
I think there's a Darwinian達爾文
purpose目的 to this.
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03:50
The whole整個 pointD of this
is to pull two people together一起
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整個目的就係將兩人拉埋一齊
等佢地可以一齊開始照顧嬰兒
03:53
strongly強烈 enough to begin初時
to rear之後 babies寶寶 as a team團隊.
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03:57
But the main主要 characteristics特徵
of romantic浪漫 love are craving渴望:
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但係,浪漫愛情嘅主要特徵係渴望
04:00
an intense激烈 craving渴望
to be with a particular特定 person,
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對某一個人產生嘅強烈渴望,唔單只喺性欲上,喺感情上都係
04:04
not just sexually, but emotionally情緒.
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04:06
It would be nice to go to bed with them,
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你寧願 - 同但上床都唔錯
但你希望佢會打電話畀你,約你去街,等等
04:10
but you want them to call you
on the telephone電話, to invite邀請 you out, etc.,
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04:14
to tell you that they love you.
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然後對你講,佢愛你
04:17
The other main主要 characteristic特徵
is motivation動機.
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另一個主要嘅特點係動力
你大腦嘅摩打會開始郁,你想得到呢個人
04:22
The motor電機 in the brain大腦 begins初時 to crank曲柄,
and you want this person.
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04:25
And last but not least最小,
it is an obsession癡迷.
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最後,但唔可以忽視嘅,愛係一種痴迷
當我將嗰啲人放入磁力共振掃描儀之前
04:28
Before I put these people
in the MRIMri machine,
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04:32
I would ask問吓 them all kinds of questions個問題.
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我會問佢地各種問題
04:34
But my most important重要 question個問題
was always the same相同.
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但係,最重要嗰個問題是一樣嘅
呢個問題係:「一日一夜之中,百分之幾嘅時間你會諗住呢個人?」
04:37
It was: "What percentage百分比 of the day
and night do you think about this person?"
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佢地眞係會講「成日。成晚。我無辦法唔去諗佢。」
04:42
And indeed講真, they would say,
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04:44
"All day. All night.
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04:46
I can never stop thinking思維
about him or her."
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04:49
And then, the very last question個問題 --
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然後,最後一個問題,我會問佢地 --
04:51
I would always have to work
myself自己 up to this question個問題,
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我每次都要為呢個問題作好心理準備
因為我唔係心理學家
04:54
because I'm not a psychologist心理學家.
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喺工作上,我唔會接觸到受過創傷嘅人
04:55
I don't work with people
in any kind一種 of traumatic外傷性 situation情況.
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而我最後嗰個問題每次都係一樣
04:59
My final最後 question個問題 was always the same相同.
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我會問「你會唔會為佢而死呀?」
05:01
I would say,
"Would you die for him or her?"
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而事實上,呢啲人會答「會!」
05:04
And, indeed講真, these people would say "Yes!"
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就好像我問佢地可唔可以遞啲鹽過來
05:06
as if I had asked問吓 them to pass透過 the salt.
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真係好得人驚
05:08
I was just staggered交錯 by it.
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05:12
So we scanned掃描 their佢哋 brains大腦,
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所以,我哋掃描佢哋嘅大腦,畀佢哋睇吓佢哋情人嘅相片,然後畀佢哋睇一張沒乜特別嘅相片
05:15
looking at a photograph
of their佢哋 sweetheart親愛的
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05:17
and looking at a neutral中性 photograph,
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仲有畀一啲令佢哋分心嘅任務
05:18
with a distraction分心 task任務 in between之間.
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咁我哋就可以發現 - 睇住同一個腦袋,當佢興奮嘅狀態
05:20
So we could look at the same相同 brain大腦
when it was in that heightened提高 state狀態
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05:25
and when it was in a resting休息 state狀態.
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同當佢靜止嘅狀態
我哋發現喺多個大腦區域都有活動
05:28
And we found發現 activity活動
in a lot of brain大腦 regions一區.
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事實上,最重要嘅就係其中一個大腦區域
05:30
In fact事實, one of the most important重要
was a brain大腦 region一區
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呢個大腦區域受到可卡因刺激時會活躍起來
05:33
that becomes成為 active積極
when you feel the rush of cocaine可卡因.
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事實上就係咁樣
05:37
And indeed講真, that's exactly完全 what happens發生.
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05:40
I began初時 to realize實現 that romantic浪漫 love
is not an emotion情感.
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我開始明白,浪漫愛情并唔係一種情感
我一直認為佢係一系列嘅情緒
05:45
In fact事實, I had always thought
it was a series系列 of emotions情緒,
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從極高至極低
05:47
from very high to very low.
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05:49
But actually講真, it's a drive驅動.
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但實際上,佢係一個驅動器。佢來自於意念中嘅摩打
05:51
It comes from the motor電機 of the mind介意,
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05:53
the wanting希望 part部分 of the mind介意,
the craving渴望 part部分 of the mind介意.
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意念中希望嗰一部分,意念中渴望嗰一部分。
呢種意念 - 就好似
05:57
The kind一種 of part部分 of the mind介意
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05:58
when you're reaching達到
for that piece一塊 of chocolate巧克力,
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當你伸手去攞嗰一塊朱古力
當你想升職嘅時侯
06:01
when you want to win贏得
that promotion推廣 at work.
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大腦入面嘅摩打,係一個驅動器
06:05
The motor電機 of the brain大腦.
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06:07
It's a drive驅動.
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06:08
And in fact事實, I think it's more powerful強大
than the sex drive驅動.
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而事實上,我覺得佢比性慾更強烈
你諗吓,如果你要求一個人同你上床,然後佢話「唔好啦,多謝」
06:11
You know, if you ask問吓 somebody有人
to go to bed with you,
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06:14
and they say, "No, thank you,"
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你一定不會因為咁而自殺或者陷入抑鬱症
06:15
you certainly梗係 don't kill yourself自己
or slip into a clinical臨床 depression抑鬱症.
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但係,世界各地,肯定有好多被愛拒絕嘅人都甘心為佢而死
06:19
But certainly梗係, around the world世界,
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06:22
people who are rejected拒絕
in love will kill for it.
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人為愛而生。為愛殺人。為愛而死。
06:27
People live for love.
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06:28
They kill for love.
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06:29
They die for love.
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06:31
They have songs歌曲, poems, novels小說,
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佢哋有歌曲,詩歌,小說,雕塑,繪畫,神話,傳說。
06:34
sculptures雕塑, paintings, myths神話, legends傳說.
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喺超過175個社會裹面,都有呢樣強大嘅大腦系統留低嘅證據
06:38
In over 175 societies社會,
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06:40
people have left their佢哋 evidence證據
of this powerful強大 brain大腦 system系統.
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我認為呢個係地球上最勁嘅大腦系統
06:45
I have come to think
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it's one of the most powerful強大
brain大腦 systems系統 on Earth地球
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佢同時產生無比喜悅同無比悲痛
06:49
for both great joy喜悅 and great sorrow悲傷.
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我認為,佢係三個之中嘅一個
06:52
And I've also come to think
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06:53
that it's one of three
basically基本上 different不同 brain大腦 systems系統
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基本上經交配同繁殖演變出來嘅大腦系統,
06:57
that evolved進化 from mating交配 and reproduction繁殖.
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第一係性慾,追求滿足性嘅欲望
06:59
One is the sex drive驅動:
the craving渴望 for sexual gratification滿足.
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07:03
W.H. Auden奥顿 called it
an "intolerable難以忍受 neural神經 itch,"
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W.H.奧登叫佢做「頂唔順嘅神經癢」
07:06
and indeed講真, that's what it is.
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而事實上就係咁
佢一直煩住你一啲啲,就好似肚餓咁
07:09
It keeps保持 bothering騷擾 you
a little bit, like being hungry肚餓.
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第二個大腦系統係浪漫嘅愛情
07:13
The second第二 of these three brain大腦
systems系統 is romantic浪漫 love:
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07:16
that elation興高采烈, obsession癡迷 of early早期 love.
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嗰種歡欣鼓舞,痴迷嘅熱戀
07:18
And the third第三 brain大腦 system系統 is attachment附件:
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第三個大腦系統係依戀感
你可以喺老伴身邊感受到嘅平靜同安全
07:21
that sense of calm平靜 and security安全
you can feel for a long-term長期 partner拍檔.
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07:25
And I think that the sex drive驅動
evolved進化 to get you out there,
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我認為性慾嘅進化係為咗帶你走來
去搵一系列嘅伴侶
07:28
looking for a whole整個 range範圍 of partners合作夥伴.
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你知道,當你開車嗰陣時你可以感受到
07:30
You can feel it when you're just
driving along沿 in your car架車.
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注意力唔使特別用喺任何人身上
07:33
It can be focused集中 on nobody.
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我覺得愛情係進化出來嘅,令你能夠集中交配嘅精力
07:35
I think romantic浪漫 love evolved進化
to enable使 you to focus重點 your mating交配 energy能源
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07:38
on just one individual at a time,
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任何時間都只係响一個人身上
07:40
thereby從而 conserving保護 mating交配 time and energy能源.
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以節省交配時間同精力
07:43
And I think that attachment附件,
the third第三 brain大腦 system系統,
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而我認為,依戀感,第三個大腦系統
進化來使你能夠容忍呢個人(眾笑)
07:46
evolved進化 to enable使 you to tolerate容忍
this human人類 being
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07:49
at least最小 long enough to raise提高
a child孩子 together一起 as a team團隊.
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等你們有至少足夠時間一齊養大一個細路
07:55
So with that preamble序言,
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以此序言,我想討論兩個最深長嘅社會趨勢
07:57
I want to go into discussing討論
the two most profound深刻 social社會 trends趨勢.
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08:03
One of the last 10,000 years
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過往一萬年- 至少係過去25年 -
08:06
and the other,
certainly梗係 of the last 25 years,
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對呢三個不同嘅大腦系統會有一定嘅影響
08:10
that are going to have an impact影響
on these three different不同 brain大腦 systems系統:
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對一個伴侶嘅性慾望,愛情同依戀感
08:15
lust欲望, romantic浪漫 love
and deep attachment附件 to a partner拍檔.
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首先係婦女工作,進入勞動市場
08:19
The first is women婦女 working工作,
moving移動 into the workforce勞動力.
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我從聯合國人口年鑑中查看咗150 或130個社會
08:26
I've looked at 130 societies社會
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08:29
through透過 the demographic人口 yearbooks年鑑
of the United聯合 Nations國家.
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喺世界各地,130個國家,其中有129個,婦女唔單只進入就業市場 --
08:31
Everywhere周圍 in the world世界,
129 out of 130 of them,
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08:36
women婦女 are not only moving移動
into the job工作 market市場 --
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08:38
sometimes有時 very, very slowly慢慢,
but they are moving移動 into the job工作 market市場 --
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雖然有時係非常,非常緩慢地,但佢地都進入緊就業市場 --
08:42
and they are very slowly慢慢 closing關閉
that gap差距 between之間 men男人 and women婦女
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而男女之間喺經濟實力,衛生同教育方面
08:46
in terms條款 of economic經濟 power權力,
health健康 and education教育.
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嘅差距慢慢咁縮細
好慢咁縮細
08:50
It's very slow.
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08:51
For every trend趨勢 on this planet星球,
there's a counter-trend反趨勢.
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每一個趨勢 - 喺呢個星球上,都有一個反趨勢
08:54
We all know of them, but nevertheless不過 --
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我地都知道佢地嘅存在,然而 - 正如阿拉伯古語
08:57
the Arabs阿拉伯人 say, "The dogs may可能 bark樹皮,
but the caravan马帮 moves移動 on."
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阿拉伯人話「狗可以吠,但車隊仍會向前行」
而事實上,呢隊車隊向緊前行
09:03
And, indeed講真, that caravan马帮 is moving移動 on.
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婦女重返就業市場
09:05
Women婦女 are moving移動 back into the job工作 market市場.
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我話重返就業市場,因為呢樣並唔係新事
09:08
And I say back into the job工作 market市場,
because this is not new新增功能.
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幾百萬年以來,喺非洲嘅草原上
09:12
For millions数百万 of years,
on the grasslands草原 of Africa非洲,
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婦女為工作而通勤,收集佢地嘅蔬菜
09:15
women婦女 commuted減刑 to work
to gather收集 their佢哋 vegetables蔬菜.
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佢地帶百分之六十至八十嘅晚餐返屋企
09:18
They came home with 60 to 80 percent百分比
of the evening晚黑 meal.
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09:22
The double income收入 family家庭 was the standard標準.
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雙收入家庭係當時嘅標準
09:25
And women婦女 were regarded認為
as just as economically經濟,
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經濟上,社會上同性權力上,當時婦女嘅力量同男人不相百仲
09:29
socially社會 and sexually powerful強大 as men男人.
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09:32
In short, we're really
moving移動 forward向前 to the past過去.
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總之,我地就好似返番去以前
然後,對婦女來講,最弊嘅發明就係犁
09:37
Then, women's婦女嘅 worst糟糕
invention發明 was the plow.
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隨著人開始用犁耕作後,男人喺角色變得非常強大
09:42
With the beginning初時 of plow agriculture農業,
men's男人嘅 roles角色 became成為 extremely powerful強大.
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婦女失去咗佢地以往採集者嘅任務
09:46
Women婦女 lost失去 their佢哋 ancient古代
jobs工作 as collectors收藏家,
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但隨着工業革命同後工業革命
09:50
but then with the industrial工業 revolution革命
and the post-industrial後工業 revolution革命
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佢地返回就業市場
09:54
they're moving移動 back into the job工作 market市場.
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簡言之,佢地重新得到佢地喺100萬年前擁有嘅地位
09:56
In short, they are acquiring獲取 the status地位
that they had a million years ago,
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一萬年前,十萬年前。
10:01
10,000 years ago, 100,000 years ago.
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10:04
We are seeing看到 now one
of the most remarkable顯著 traditions傳統
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我地依家睇嘅係人類歷史上一個最顯著嘅傳統
10:09
in the history歷史 of the human人類 animal動物.
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而佢係會產生影響嘅
10:13
And it's going to have an impact影響.
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我通常會用成個講議講婦女喺商界嘅影響
10:15
I generally麻麻 give a whole整個 lecture演講
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10:16
on the impact影響 of women婦女
on the business業務 community社區.
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我今日只會略略講一下,然後再講性同愛
10:18
I'll say just a couple夫婦 of things,
and then go on to sex and love.
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性別上嘅差異有好多
10:22
There's a lot of gender性別 differences差異;
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認為男人跟女人是相同嘅人大慨從來未試過帶大一個男孩同一個女孩吧
10:23
anybody任何人 who thinks認為 men男人 and women婦女 are alike一樣
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10:26
simply淨係 never had a boy男孩 and a girl女孩 child孩子.
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我唔知道佢地點解認為男人因女人都是一樣嘅
10:28
I don't know why they want to think
that men男人 and women婦女 are alike一樣.
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我地有好多共通點,但喺很多方面
10:31
There's much we have in common常見,
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10:32
but there's a whole整個 lot
that we do not have in common常見.
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我地無共通點
10:35
We are -- in the words的話 of Ted泰德 Hughes休斯,
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我地係 - 引用泰德休斯嘅話
10:37
"I think that we are like two feet隻腳.
We need each每個 other to get ahead提前."
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「我認為,我地係專登生成咁樣嘅 - 我地就好似兩隻腳。我地需要對方先至可以前進」
但係,我地無進化到個大腦一樣
10:42
But we did not evolve進化
to have the same相同 brain大腦.
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10:45
And we're finding發現 more and more
gender性別 differences差異 in the brain大腦.
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我地從大腦中發現越來越多性別上嘅差異
我只舉幾個例子,然後就講性與愛。
10:49
I'll only just use a couple夫婦
and then move移動 on to sex and love.
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10:52
One of them is women's婦女嘅 verbal口頭 ability能力.
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其中之一是女人嘅口頭表達能力。女人好講得。
10:54
Women婦女 can talk.
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10:55
Women's婦女嘅 ability能力 to find the right word
rapidly迅速, basic基本 articulation關節
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女人有迅速地選擇合適嘅詞語同基本發音嘅能力,而呢個能力
10:59
goes up in the middle中間
of the menstrual月經 cycle周期,
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係會隨着雌激素水平上升而題升,喺月經週期嘅中段達到高峰
11:02
when estrogen雌激素 levels水平 peak峰值.
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但即使喺月經期間,佢地嘅語言能力都仲係比一般男人強
11:03
But even at menstruation月經,
they're better than the average平均 man.
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女人十分「講得」
11:07
Women婦女 can talk.
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數百萬年來佢地一直都係咁;文字係婦女嘅工具
11:09
They've佢地已經 been doing it for a million years;
words的話 were women's婦女嘅 tools工具.
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11:12
They held舉行 that baby寶貝
in front前面 of their佢哋 face塊面,
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佢地將嬰兒放喺面前
哄佢,譴責佢,教佢講嘢
11:14
cajoling it, reprimanding譴責 it,
educating教育 it with words的話.
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而事實上,佢地成為緊一股非常強大嘅力量
11:18
And, indeed講真, they're becoming成為
a very powerful強大 force.
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11:21
Even in places地方 like India印度 and Japan日本,
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即使喺印度同日本呢啲國家
儘管婦女未能迅速地進入正規就業市場
11:27
where women婦女 are not moving移動 rapidly迅速
into the regular定期 job工作 market市場,
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11:30
they're moving移動 into journalism新聞.
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佢地好多時投身新聞界
11:32
And I think that the television電視
is like the global全球 campfire篝火.
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我認為電視就好似全球性嘅營火
11:36
We sit around it and it shapes形狀 our minds頭腦.
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我地圍着佢坐,佢塑造着我地嘅思想
11:40
Almost爭 D always, when I'm on TV電視,
the producer生產者 who calls調用 me,
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幾乎每次,當我電視上嘅時候,打電話俾我嘅制片人都係女人
同我地談判演講內容嘅總係一個女人
11:44
who negotiates談判 what we're going to say,
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11:47
is a woman女人.
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事實上,索爾仁尼琴曾經講過
11:48
In fact事實, Solzhenitsyn尼琴 once一旦 said,
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「有一個好嘅筆者就係有另一個政府」
11:50
"To have a great writer作家
is to have another另一個 government政府."
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今日,美國百分之五十四嘅作家係女人。
11:54
Today今日 54 percent百分比 of people
who are writers作家 in America美國 are women婦女.
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呢樣係女性許多,許多特色之其一
11:59
It's one of many好多,
many好多 characteristics特徵 that women婦女 have
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佢地可以將呢個能力帶入就業市場
12:02
that they will bring into the job工作 market市場.
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佢地有令人難以置信嘅人際技巧,談判技巧
12:04
They've佢地已經 got incredible不可思議 people skills技能,
negotiating談判 skills技能.
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佢地好有想像力
12:09
They're highly高度 imaginative富有想象力.
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12:10
We now know the brain大腦 circuitry電路
of imagination想象, of long-term長期 planning規劃.
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我地依家知道想像力同長期規劃能力嘅大腦電路系統
佢地往往係網絡思想家
12:15
They tend往往 to be webWeb thinkers思想家.
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12:17
Because the female女性 parts部分
of the brain大腦 are better connected連接,
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由於女性嘅大腦部分比男人嘅連接得更好
當女人思考時,佢地往往會收集更多嘅數據
12:20
they tend往往 to collect收集 more
pieces of data數據 when they think,
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將佢地放入複雜嘅模式,睇到更多選擇同結果
12:23
put them into more complex複雜 patterns模式,
see more options選項 and outcomes結果.
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佢地往往着重於關聯性嘅,整體嘅思想家,我所稱之為嘅網絡思想家
12:28
They tend往往 to be contextual語境,
holistic整體 thinkers思想家,
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12:32
what I call webWeb thinkers思想家.
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12:33
Men男人 tend往往 to -- and these are averages平均 --
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男性嘅傾向係 - 普遍來講 - 往往拋開佢地認為無關嘅
12:35
tend往往 to get rid擺脫 of what they regard方面
as extraneous無關,
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淨係專注於佢地做緊嘅嘢,並用一步一步嘅思維模式運作
12:38
focus重點 on what they do,
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12:39
and move移動 in a more
step-by-step逐步 thinking思維 pattern模式.
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呢兩種都是非常好嘅思維方式
12:45
They're both perfectly完全 good
ways方式 of thinking思維.
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我地需要有呢兩種思維方式先可以成功
12:48
We need both of them to get ahead提前.
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12:50
In fact事實, there's many好多 more
male男性 geniuses天才 in the world世界.
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事實上,世上嘅男天才比女嘅多
12:53
And there's also many好多 more
male男性 idiots白痴 in the world世界.
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但世上嘅男白痴就更多(眾笑)
12:56
(Laughter笑聲)
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當男性大腦運作良好嘅時候,佢可運作得非常好。
12:58
When the male男性 brain大腦 works工程 well,
it works工程 extremely well.
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我確實認為我地建立緊一個合作性嘅社會
13:01
And what I really think
that we're doing is,
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13:04
we're moving移動 towards
a collaborative協同 society社會,
252
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喺呢個社會入面,越來越多人會理解男性同女性嘅才能
13:07
a society社會 in which the talents人才
of both men男人 and women婦女
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13:09
are becoming成為 understood理解
and valued and employed僱用.
254
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而被重視同使用
13:13
But in fact事實, women婦女 moving移動
into the job工作 market市場
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但事實上,婦女進入就業市場正產生緊巨大嘅影響
13:16
is having a huge巨大 impact影響
on sex and romance浪漫 and family家庭 life.
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喺性,感情同家庭生活方面
最重要嘅係,女性正開始表達佢地嘅性特性
13:22
Foremost首要, women婦女 are starting初時
to express表達 their佢哋 sexuality.
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13:27
I'm always astonished驚訝
when people come to me and say,
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2626
我總覺得驚訝,當人哋同我講:
「男人點解咁鍾意去滾呢?」
13:30
"Why is it that men男人 are so adulterous通姦?"
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我會講:「你點解覺得男人去滾多過女人呢?」
13:32
"Why do you think
more men男人 are adulterous通姦 than women婦女?"
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「哦,總之男人就係鍾意去滾多啲!」
13:35
"Well, men男人 are more adulterous通姦!"
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我會講,「咁你認為呢啲男人會同咩人上床呀?」
13:36
And I say, "Who do you think
these men男人 are sleeping瞓覺 with?"
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基本嘅數學!(眾笑)
13:39
(Laughter笑聲)
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13:41
And -- basic基本 math數學!
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總之。
13:42
Anyway反正.
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喺西方世界裡面,細路女開始 -
13:44
In the Western西方 world世界,
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13:47
women婦女 start初時 sooner at sex,
have more partners合作夥伴,
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女性較早有性行為,而且有更多嘅性伴侶
13:50
express表達 less remorse悔恨
for the partners合作夥伴 that they do,
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對佢地有過嘅伴侶比較少後悔
13:53
marry嫁畀 later之後, have fewer children孩子,
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晚婚,少生細路,會離開唔愉快嘅婚姻,去得到更好嘅婚姻
13:56
leave離開 bad marriages婚姻
in order to get good ones.
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13:59
We are seeing看到 the rise上升
of female女性 sexual expression表達.
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我地睇到女性嘅性表達加強
而事實上,我地再次邁向嘅性表現
14:03
And, indeed講真, once一旦 again we're moving移動
forward向前 to the kind一種 of sexual expression表達
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可能就好似我地一百萬年前喺非洲嘅草原見過嘅
14:08
that we probably可能 saw on the grasslands草原
of Africa非洲 a million years ago,
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14:11
because this is the kind一種
of sexual expression表達 that we see
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因為呢種性表現就好似我哋
14:14
in hunting狩獵 and gathering收集 societies社會 today今日.
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今日喺狩獵同採集性嘅社會裡面可以睇看到嘅
14:17
We're also returning返回
to an ancient古代 form形式 of marriage婚姻 equality平等.
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我地有番古老嘅平等形式婚姻
啲人依家話,二十一世紀
14:22
They're now saying that the 21st century世紀
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14:26
is going to be the century世紀 of what
they call the "symmetrical對稱 marriage婚姻,"
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會係佢地所講嘅「對稱婚姻」嘅世紀
14:30
or the "pure marriage婚姻,"
or the "companionate結伴 marriage婚姻."
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或者「純粹婚姻」,或者「伴侶婚姻」
呢樣係一個平等夥伴之間嘅婚姻
14:36
This is a marriage婚姻 between之間 equals等於,
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14:39
moving移動 forward向前 to a pattern模式
281
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返番去一個配合古代人類精神嘅模式
14:42
that is highly高度 compatible兼容
with the ancient古代 human人類 spirit精神.
282
857467
3134
14:46
We're also seeing看到 a rise上升 of romantic浪漫 love.
283
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我地亦都見到浪漫愛情嘅興起
14:49
91 percent百分比 of American美國 women婦女
and 86 percent百分比 of American美國 men男人
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百分之91嘅美國女性,同百分之86嘅美國男人
不會同一個合符嗮佢地要求嘅人結婚
14:53
would not marry嫁畀 somebody有人
who had every single quality質素
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4603
14:58
they were looking for in a partner拍檔,
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1816
除非佢愛嗰個人
15:00
if they were not in love with that person.
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世界各地嘅人,喺37個社會嘅研究
15:03
People around the world世界,
in a study研究 of 37 societies社會,
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希望會愛佢地嘅結婚對象
15:06
want to be in love
with the person that they marry嫁畀.
289
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事實上,盲婚啞嫁嘅包辦婚姻正漸漸没落
15:10
Indeed講真, arranged安排 marriages婚姻 are
on their佢哋 way off this braid編織 of human人類 life.
290
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15:20
I even think that marriages婚姻
might可能 even become成為 more stable穩定
291
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我甚至認為婚姻可能會變得更加穩定
因為世界上第二大嘅趨勢
15:23
because of the second第二 great world世界 trend趨勢.
292
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第一個係婦女進入就業市場
15:27
The first one being women婦女
moving移動 into the job工作 market市場,
293
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2762
15:29
the second第二 one being
the aging老化 world世界 population人口.
294
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第二個係世界人口老齡化
15:32
They're now saying that in America美國,
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人地依家話,喺美國,
到85歲都仲係算係中年
15:35
that middle中間 age年齡 should be regarded認為
as up to age年齡 85.
296
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3651
因為就算係呢個最高嘅年齡組別,76至85歲 --
15:39
Because in that highest最高
age年齡 category類別 of 76 to 85,
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差唔多百分之四十嘅人身體冇乜問題
15:44
as much as 40 percent百分比 of people
have nothing really wrong with them.
298
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3431
15:47
So we're seeing看到 there's a real真正
extension擴展 of middle中間 age年齡.
299
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所以,我哋睇到中年嘅延長
15:51
For one of my books,
I looked at divorce離婚 data數據 in 58 societies社會.
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我查過 - 為我嘅一本書,我查過58個社會離婚嘅數據
15:56
And as it turns輪流 out, the older you get,
the less likely可能 you are to divorce離婚.
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我發現,你年紀越大,離婚嘅可能性就越低
因此,美國依家嘅離婚率穩定
16:01
So the divorce離婚 rate right now
is stable穩定 in America美國,
302
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實際上開始跌
16:05
and it's actually講真 beginning初時 to decline下降.
303
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16:07
It may可能 decline下降 some more.
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可能仲會再跌低啲
我甚至覺得,隨著偉哥,雌激素補充,髖關節置換
16:11
I would even say that with Viagra偉仔,
305
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3999
16:15
estrogen雌激素 replacement更換, hip髖関節 replacements更換
306
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3815
同埋難以置信地有趣嘅女人
16:19
and the incredibly令人難以置信 interesting有趣 women婦女
307
954995
1981
16:21
-- women婦女 have never been
as interesting有趣 as they are now.
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--女人從來未試過好似佢地依家咁有趣
喺呢個星球,女人從來未試過好似依家咁高教育,咁有味道,咁能幹
16:24
Not at any time on this planet星球
have women婦女 been so educated教育,
309
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3458
16:28
so interesting有趣, so capable可以.
310
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1947
所以,我眞係認為,如果喺人類進化史上
16:30
And so I honestly真係 think that if there
really was ever a time in human人類 evolution演化
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我們有機會搞好婚姻,依家就係時候
16:36
when we have the opportunity機會 to make
good marriages婚姻, that time is now.
312
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3865
16:41
However然而, there's always kinds
of complications併發症 in this.
313
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但係,有啲嘢都幾複雜
呢三個大腦系統:性慾,浪漫愛情同依戀
16:44
These three brain大腦 systems系統
-- lust欲望, romantic浪漫 love and attachment附件 --
314
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4717
唔一定成日都可以一齊
16:49
don't always go together一起.
315
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1354
但佢地係可以兼容嘅
16:50
They can go together一起, by the way.
316
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所以隨便嘅性交並唔係咁隨便嘅
16:52
That's why casual休閒 sex isn't so casual休閒.
317
987583
1952
隨着性高潮,你大腦會產生多巴胺
16:54
With orgasm高潮 you get a spike of dopamine多巴胺.
318
989559
2269
多巴胺關聯到浪漫愛情
16:56
Dopamine's多巴胺的 associated相關 with romantic浪漫 love,
319
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2096
所以你可以愛上一個隨便性交嘅伴侶
16:58
and you can just
fall秋天 in love with somebody有人
320
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2023
17:00
who you're just having casual休閒 sex with.
321
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1863
有咗性高潮,你會產生大量嘅催產素同加壓素
17:02
With orgasm高潮, then you get a real真正 rush
of oxytocin催產素 and vasopressin加壓素 --
322
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3436
使你聯系到依戀感
17:06
those are associated相關 with attachment附件.
323
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2031
因為咁,你可以感受到同另一個人嘅宇宙結合
17:08
This is why you can feel such a sense
of cosmic宇宙 union聯盟 with somebody有人
324
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3959
當你同佢造完愛之後
17:12
after you've made作出 love to them.
325
1007404
1849
但呢三個大腦系統:性慾,浪漫愛情同依戀
17:14
But these three brain大腦 systems系統:
lust欲望, romantic浪漫 love and attachment附件,
326
1009277
4699
17:18
aren't唔係 always connected連接 to each每個 other.
327
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2481
並唔一定係彼此相連嘅
17:21
You can feel deep attachment附件
to a long-term長期 partner拍檔
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3251
你可以對你嘅長期伴侶有深厚感情同依戀
同時可以對另一個人有強烈嘅浪漫愛情感覺
17:25
while you feel intense激烈
romantic浪漫 love for somebody有人 else,
329
1020275
4092
同時又可對其他人有性慾
17:29
while you feel the sex drive驅動 for people
unrelated無關 to these other partners合作夥伴.
330
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5453
總之,同一時間我哋能夠愛多過一個人
17:35
In short, we're capable可以 of loving
more than one person at a time.
331
1030312
5029
事實上,當你夜晚瞓喺床上面
17:40
In fact事實, you can lie謊言 in bed at night
332
1035714
1992
你嘅感覺可以從對一個人深厚的依附轉到
17:42
and swing擺動 from deep feelings感情
of attachment附件 for one person
333
1037730
3246
17:45
to deep feelings感情
of romantic浪漫 love for somebody有人 else.
334
1041000
3432
對另一個人嘅浪漫愛意
就好像喺你個腦袋裏面開緊一個委員會會議
17:49
It's as if there's a committee委員會 meeting
going on in your head
335
1044456
2881
正當你試圖決定點做
17:52
as you are trying試圖 to decide決定 what to do.
336
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3127
所以坦白講,我唔認為,我哋呢樣生物,注定係快樂嘅
17:55
So I don't think, honestly真係,
337
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1635
17:56
we're an animal動物
that was built建立 to be happy快樂;
338
1052171
2015
人類呢樣動物係為繁殖而生嘅
17:59
we are an animal動物
that was built建立 to reproduce繁殖.
339
1054210
2268
我認為,我哋揾到嘅幸福係要靠我哋自己去創造嘅
18:01
I think the happiness幸福 we find, we make.
340
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2935
18:04
And I think, however然而,
341
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3482
不過,我認為我哋可以建立良好嘅關係
18:07
we can make good relationships關係
with each每個 other.
342
1062967
2667
18:10
So I want to conclude結束 with two things.
343
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2105
因此,我想總結兩件事
我想以憂慮來總結
18:12
I want to conclude結束 with a worry,
344
1068129
2047
我有一個憂慮 - 同一個美好嘅故事
18:15
and with a wonderful美妙 story故事.
345
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2929
我擔心嘅係對抗抑鬱嘅藥物
18:19
The worry is about antidepressants抗抑鬱藥.
346
1074287
2689
每年喺美國有超過一億張抗抑鬱藥嘅處方被派發
18:23
Over 100 million prescriptions處方
of antidepressants抗抑鬱藥
347
1078631
5132
18:28
are written every year
in the United聯合 States國家.
348
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2821
而呢啲藥物變得通用
18:31
And these drugs藥物 are going generic通用.
349
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2565
18:34
They are seeping滲透 around the world世界.
350
1089689
2483
佢地滲透世界各地
我認識一個使用呢啲抗抑鬱藥嘅女仔,增強五羥色胺嘅藥
18:37
I know one girl女孩 who's邊個係 been
on these antidepressants抗抑鬱藥,
351
1092743
5233
18:42
SSRIsSSRIs, serotonin-enhancing增強血清素
antidepressants抗抑鬱藥 -- since因為 she was 13.
352
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3976
從佢13歲開始,佢一直使用再攝取抑製劑 - 加強羥色胺嘅抗抑鬱藥
18:46
She's 23. She's been on them
ever since因為 she was 13.
353
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佢依家23歲。佢從13歲開始就一直使用呢啲藥物
18:49
I've got nothing against people
who take them short term術語,
354
1105000
3516
我唔反對人哋短期性地使用呢啲藥物
18:53
when they're going
through透過 something horrible可怕.
355
1108540
2223
當佢哋經歷緊非常可怕嘅事情
18:55
They want to commit提交 suicide自殺
or kill somebody有人 else.
356
1110787
2355
當佢地想自殺或殺死人哋嘅時候
我會推薦佢地用呢啲藥物
18:57
I would recommend推薦 it.
357
1113166
1068
但係,喺美國越來越多人長期服用呢啲藥物
18:59
But more and more people
in the United聯合 States國家
358
1114258
2459
19:01
are taking採取 them long term術語.
359
1116741
2384
事實上,呢啲藥物嘅作用係提高羥色胺嘅水平
19:03
And indeed講真, what these drugs藥物 do
is raise提高 levels水平 of serotonin5羥色胺.
360
1119149
5365
提高咗羥色胺嘅水平,多巴胺會被抑制
19:09
And by raising提高 levels水平 of serotonin5羥色胺,
you suppress抑制 the dopamine多巴胺 circuit電路.
361
1124974
4821
19:14
Everybody大家 knows that.
362
1129819
1562
大家都知道
19:16
Dopamine多巴胺 is associated相關 with romantic浪漫 love.
363
1131944
2895
多巴胺係聯系着浪漫愛情嘅
19:21
Not only do they suppress抑制
the dopamine多巴胺 circuit電路,
364
1136627
3150
抗抑鬱藥唔單只抑制多巴胺,佢仲會會埋沒性慾
19:24
but they kill the sex drive驅動.
365
1139801
1867
當你埋沒咗性慾,你亦埋沒咗性高潮
19:27
And when you kill the sex drive驅動,
you kill orgasm高潮.
366
1142316
3824
當你埋沒咗高潮,你亦埋沒咗嗰堆聯系着依戀感嘅化學物
19:30
And when you kill orgasm高潮,
367
1146164
1191
19:32
you kill that flood洪水 of drugs藥物
associated相關 with attachment附件.
368
1147379
3867
大腦入面嘅嘢係連接住嘅
19:36
The things are connected連接 in the brain大腦.
369
1151712
2264
19:38
And when you tamper篡改 with one brain大腦 system系統,
370
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2656
當你篡改大腦其中一個系統嘅時候
你會整到另一個系統
19:41
you're going to tamper篡改 with another另一個.
371
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1945
19:43
I'm just simply淨係 saying that a world世界
without love is a deadly致命 place地方.
372
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4754
我只係簡單地講,冇愛嘅世界是一個枯燥嘅地方
19:49
So now --
373
1164738
1002
所以,依家 - (掌聲) - 謝謝你。
19:50
(Applause掌聲)
374
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4212
19:54
Thank you.
375
1170000
1703
我想用一個小故事去結束。然後,一個意見。
19:56
I want to end結束 with a story故事.
376
1171727
1485
19:58
And then, just a comment評論.
377
1173839
1300
我花咗30年去學習浪漫愛情,性同依戀
20:01
I've been studying研究 romantic浪漫 love
and sex and attachment附件 for 30 years.
378
1176741
4779
我係雙胞胎,我對點解我地都係一樣而感興趣
20:08
I'm an identical相同 twin;
I am interested興趣 in why we're all alike一樣.
379
1183774
3516
點解你同我都咁相似,點解伊拉克人同日本人
20:12
Why you and I are alike一樣,
why the Iraqis伊拉克 and the Japanese日文
380
1187925
3051
20:15
and the Australian澳洲 Aborigines原住民
and the people of the Amazon亞馬遜 River
381
1191000
3000
澳洲原住民同喺亞馬遜河嘅人都咁相似
20:18
are all alike一樣.
382
1194024
1000
20:20
And about a year ago,
383
1195777
2309
大約一年前,一個網絡交友服務嘅綱站,Match.com,來揾我
20:22
an Internet互聯網 dating拍拖 service服務,
Match匹配.comCom, came to me
384
1198110
2985
問我可唔可以幫佢哋設計一個新嘅交友網站
20:25
and asked問吓 me if I would design設計
a new新增功能 dating拍拖 site網站 for them.
385
1201119
3652
20:29
I said, "I don't know anything
about personality人格. You know?
386
1204795
2802
我話:「我對人物個性咩都唔識。你知道嗎?」
20:32
I don't know. Do you think
you've got the right person?"
387
1207621
2720
「我唔知呀。你真係認為我係合適嘅人選?」
佢地話:「係」
20:35
They said, "Yes."
388
1210365
1040
我開始諗點解你會愛上呢個人,而唔係嗰個人
20:36
It got me thinking思維
about why it is that you fall秋天 in love
389
1211429
3023
20:39
with one person rather than another另一個.
390
1214476
1732
呢樣就係我當前嘅項目,係我下一本書嘅題材
20:41
That's my current當前 project項目;
it will be my next book.
391
1216232
3443
有各種原因令你愛上一個人,而唔係其他人
20:45
There's all kinds of reasons原因
392
1220262
1539
20:46
that you fall秋天 in love
with one person rather than another另一個.
393
1221825
2753
時間非常重要。距離嘅遠近亦係重要
20:49
Timing時間 is important重要.
Proximity接近 is important重要.
394
1224602
3286
神秘感係重要嘅。你愛上嘅人係要有點神秘感嘅
20:52
Mystery神秘 is important重要.
395
1227912
1380
20:54
You fall秋天 in love with somebody有人
who's邊個係 somewhat有 D mysterious神秘,
396
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2729
部分原因係神秘感可提升係大腦中嘅多巴胺
20:56
in part部分 because mystery神秘
elevates提升 dopamine多巴胺 in the brain大腦,
397
1232069
2678
可能將你推入戀愛嘅門檻
20:59
probably可能 pushes you
over that threshold閾值 to fall秋天 in love.
398
1234771
2766
你愛上嘅人會吻合你嘅「愛圖」
21:02
You fall秋天 in love with somebody有人
399
1237561
1429
21:03
who fits within
what I call your "love map地圖,"
400
1239014
2095
係你由童年時,無意識地建立嘅特性清單
21:05
an unconscious無意識 list列表 of traits性狀
401
1241133
2147
21:08
that you build建立 in childhood童年
as you grow成長 up.
402
1243304
2314
我亦認為你變得
21:10
And I also think
that you gravitate吸引 to certain一定 people,
403
1245642
3042
被某啲人吸引,其實是因為你們有互相配合嘅大腦系統
21:13
actually講真, with somewhat有 D
complementary互補 brain大腦 systems系統.
404
1248708
3268
21:16
And that's what I'm now
contributing貢獻 to this.
405
1252000
2287
而呢樣正係我依家想講嘅
但我想同你講一個故事 - 去描述
21:19
But I want to tell you
a story故事, to illustrate.
406
1254311
3665
21:22
I've been carrying承載 on here
about the biology生物學 of love.
407
1258000
2976
我一直喺度講愛嘅生物學源頭
我都想同你講一啲關於愛嘅文化
21:26
I wanted to show顯示 you a little bit
about the culture文化 of it, too,
408
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3687
佢嘅魔力
21:30
the magic魔法 of it.
409
1265420
1167
21:32
It's a story故事 that was told to me
410
1268000
3349
呢個故事係由人哋講我知嘅,而佢又係聽另一個人講嘅
21:36
by somebody有人 who had
heard聽到 it just from one --
411
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2461
可能係真人真事
21:38
probably可能 a true真係 story故事.
412
1273858
1118
佢係個研究生 - 係我喺羅格斯大學嘅兩位同事 -
21:41
It was a graduate畢業 student學生 --
I'm at Rutgers罗格斯 and my two colleagues同事 --
413
1276508
3468
21:44
Art藝術 Aron阿隆 is at SUNY州立 Stony Brook小谿.
414
1280000
1976
阿倫係喺石溪嘅紐約州立大學
21:46
That's where we put our people
in the MRIMri machine.
415
1282000
2371
喺我哋將人放入磁力共振掃描儀嘅地方
21:49
And this graduate畢業 student學生 was madly
in love with another另一個 graduate畢業 student學生,
416
1285000
4563
呢位研究生瘋狂地愛上咗另一個研究生
但係佢(女)並唔愛佢(男)
21:54
and she was not in love with him.
417
1289587
2373
有一次但佢地去咗北京開會
21:58
And they were
all at a conference in Beijing北京.
418
1293206
2255
佢從我哋嘅研究上知道,如果你同一個人去做一啲新奇嘅事
22:01
And he knew from our work
419
1296485
3034
22:04
that if you go and do something
very novel小說 with somebody有人,
420
1299543
4408
你可以提升喺大腦中嘅多巴胺
22:08
you can drive驅動 up
the dopamine多巴胺 in the brain大腦,
421
1303975
2001
22:10
and perhaps或者 trigger觸發 this brain大腦
system系統 for romantic浪漫 love.
422
1306000
3693
或者能夠觸發大腦系統感到浪漫愛情 (眾笑)
22:14
(Laughter笑聲)
423
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2157
所以,佢決定試驗一下呢個科學理論
22:16
So he decided決定 he'd佢會 put science科學 to work.
424
1311898
3886
佢邀請呢位姑娘去同佢一齊坐人力車
22:21
And he invited邀請 this girl女孩 to go off
on a rickshaw車仔 ride with him.
425
1316624
3334
22:25
And sure enough -- I've never been in one,
426
1320809
2069
果然 - 我從來未坐過
22:27
but apparently顯然 they go
all around the buses巴士 and the trucks貨車
427
1322902
2738
聽講佢哋從巴士同貨車之間穿插
好瘋狂,好嘈,好令人興奮
22:30
and it's crazy and it's noisy
and it's exciting令人興奮.
428
1325664
2818
佢估計,今次實可以提升多巴胺
22:33
He figured that this would drive驅動 up
the dopamine多巴胺,
429
1328506
2286
令佢愛上佢
22:35
and she'd佢會 fall秋天 in love with him.
430
1330816
1532
佢地出發啦,途中佢(女)猛咁尖叫又攬住佢(男)
22:37
So off they go and she's squealing
and squeezing壓縮 him
431
1332372
4974
一路笑住度過咗一段美好嘅時間
22:42
and laughing and having a wonderful美妙 time.
432
1337370
2517
22:44
An hour小時 later之後 they get down
off of the rickshaw車仔,
433
1339911
3539
一個鐘頭後,當佢哋落人力車嘅時候
22:48
and she throws拋出 her hands up and she says,
434
1343474
3580
佢(女)舉高雙手話:「好正呀!」
22:51
"Wasn't唔係 that wonderful美妙?"
435
1347078
2312
「嗰個車伕眞靚仔!」
22:54
And, "Wasn't唔係 that rickshaw車仔
driver司機 handsome英俊!"
436
1349414
3414
22:57
(Laughter笑聲)
437
1352852
3069
(眾笑)(鼓掌)
23:00
(Applause掌聲)
438
1355945
6031
23:06
There's magic魔法 to love!
439
1362000
1162
愛嘅魔力!
23:07
(Applause掌聲)
440
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1611
不過,去總結,我想講,幾百萬年前,我哋進化咗三個基本驅動器
23:09
But I will end結束 by saying
that millions数百万 of years ago,
441
1364821
3620
23:13
we evolved進化 three basic基本 drives驅動器:
442
1368465
2332
性慾,浪漫愛情同對長期伴侶嘅依戀
23:15
the sex drive驅動, romantic浪漫 love
443
1370821
2519
23:18
and attachment附件 to a long-term長期 partner拍檔.
444
1373364
2340
呢啲電路巳深深地嵌入咗人類大腦入面
23:20
These circuits電路 are deeply深深
embedded嵌入式 in the human人類 brain大腦.
445
1375728
3079
只要我哋呢樣物種生存落去,佢地都會生存落去
23:24
They're going to survive生存
as long as our species物種 survives生存
446
1379203
4403
正如莎士比亞所謂嘅「這凡人的盤繞」
23:28
on what Shakespeare莎士比亞 called
"this mortal凡人 coil線圈."
447
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2708
多謝。 (鼓掌)
23:31
Thank you.
448
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1006
23:32
Chris克里斯 Anderson安德森: Helen海倫 Fisher费沙!
449
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1425
23:33
(Applause掌聲)
450
1388841
1063
Translated by Nedra Fu
Reviewed by Mandy Lo

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ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Helen Fisher - Anthropologist, expert on love
Anthropologist Helen Fisher studies gender differences and the evolution of human emotions. She’s best known as an expert on romantic love.

Why you should listen

Fisher's several books lay bare the mysteries of our most treasured emotion: its evolution, its biochemical foundations and its vital importance to human society. Fisher describes love as a universal human drive (stronger than the sex drive; stronger than thirst or hunger; stronger perhaps than the will to live), and her many areas of inquiry shed light on timeless human mysteries like why we choose one partner over another. Her classic study, Anatomy of Love, first published in 1992, has just been re-issued in a fully updated edition, including her recent neuroimaging research on lust, romantic love and attachment as well as discussions of sexting, hooking up, friends with benefits, other contemporary trends in courtship and marriage, and a dramatic current trend she calls “slow love.”

More profile about the speaker
Helen Fisher | Speaker | TED.com