Susan David: The gift and power of emotional courage
Susan David, a Harvard Medical School psychologist, studies emotional agility: the psychology of how we can use emotion to bring forward our best selves in all aspects of how we love, live, parent and lead. Full bio
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intention behind the word
literally translated means,
I bring you into being."
being greeted like that.
in the way we see ourselves?
and fraught world?
at the center of my life's work.
with our inner world drives everything.
of emotions as good or bad,
of complexity is toxic.
of emotional agility
of a university,
of apartheid South Africa,
committed to not seeing.
of racist legislation possible
that they are doing nothing wrong.
of the destructive power of denial
to the country of my birth.
and say goodbye to my father
and walked the passage that ran through
my father lay dying of cancer.
but he knew I was there.
to mathematics to history to biology,
I would shrug and say, "OK."
to keep his small business going
was grieving the love of her life
and emotionally ravaged.
the full weight of my grief.
that values relentless positivity,
my story of triumph over grief.
fixed me with burning blue eyes
authentically to my grief and pain.
that started in this blank notebook
correspondence with myself.
the rigidity of denial
from its fragility.
that we are unseen.
where that child once was,
brings us to our knees.
this frailty successfully or sustainably.
tells us that depression
of disability globally --
political and economic change,
into rigid responses to their emotions.
obsessively brood on our feelings.
bottle our emotions,
with over 70,000 people,
so-called "bad emotions,"
like our children --
out of emotions seen as negative,
as inherently valuable.
are now seen as good or bad.
a new form of moral correctness.
to just stay positive.
or false positivity, it's this:
lesson we can learn
are pushed aside or ignored,
in the refrigerator --
of unwanted emotions when you ignore them,
to embrace false positivity,
to deal with the world as it is,
what they don't want to feel.
I don't want to feel disappointed."
by their feelings.
that comes with failure.
of our contract with life.
to a meaningful life.
to what I did feel.
of all of our emotions --
to resilience, thriving,
that just an acceptance of emotions.
I found that words are essential.
to describe our feelings.
common one I hear.
between stress and disappointment
of "I'm in the wrong career."
the precise cause of our feelings.
the readiness potential in our brain
to take concrete steps.
the right steps for us.
to things that we care about.
anything in our worlds.
that you value equity and fairness --
to the difficult emotions,
that are values-aligned.
they are not directives.
our emotions for their values
in his frustration with his baby sister --
that he gets to give her away
he sees in a shopping mall.
between how I feel in all my wisdom
to the journal of your hearts.
as in, "I'm angry" or "I'm sad."
as if you are the emotion.
and the emotion is a data source.
the feeling for what it is:
to bring the best of themselves to work,
to feel their emotional truth,
flourish in the organization.
to the normal human emotions.
towards my values?"
to be with your emotions
to take values-connected steps.
terrified by the idea of death.
with soft pats and kisses.
a buffer between me and reality.
through those nights.
is not an absence of fear;
is all too precious
correspondence with your own heart.
ABOUT THE SPEAKERSusan David - Psychologist, researcher, author
Susan David, a Harvard Medical School psychologist, studies emotional agility: the psychology of how we can use emotion to bring forward our best selves in all aspects of how we love, live, parent and lead.
Why you should listen
What does it take internally, in the way we deal with our thoughts, emotions and stories, for us to thrive in a complex and changing world? How we respond to these inner experiences drives our actions, careers, relationships, happiness, health -- everything that matters in our lives. Susan David became fascinated by this question through first-hand experience of loss and resilience, while growing up in a country in which hate was legislated: apartheid South Africa.
David holds a PhD in the psychology of emotions, is an award-winning Harvard Medical School psychologist, and is ranked as one of the world's leading management thinkers. Her #1 Wall Street Journal bestselling book, Emotional Agility, describes the psychological skills critical to thriving in times of complexity and change. David is CEO of Evidence Based Psychology, on Harvard Medical School faculty, and a co-founder of the Institute of Coaching. Described as "a powerful speaker, visionary thinker and inspirational personality," she is an unwavering believer in the power of people to bring the best of who they are to themselves, their children, their organizations and their communities.
Susan David | Speaker | TED.com